My Love for Him Led Me to You
by Uninhibitedimagination
Summary: Santana is emotionally closed off, she protects herself from others, until she meets Brittany. A story of why Brittany is the only exception to Santana's closed off nature.
1. Chapter 1: Best Friends Since We Met

**Author's Notes:**

** This is a story about Santana meeting and ultimately falling in love with Brittany. It will follow cannon for the most part. **

** There is a new character introduced in this story and it is through this chapter that Santana will grow and come to understand her love for Brittany. **

** This is a M rated story for future chapters, but since the story starts when they are 11, there will be a fair number of chapters before anything M happens.**

** Of course I do not own anything Glee related. This is merely a story!**

** This story is written from Santana's POV, if you would prefer it from Brittany's POV then read the accompanying story "Your Love for Him Led You to Me."**

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><p>Chapter 1 – Best Friends Since We Met June 2005<p>

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><p>Trying out for cheerleading has never really about being a cheerleader; it was about doing something that would challenge me, that would make me work harder, that would strengthen me, and in the end that would make me popular. I know that I should not be so worried about popularity but I am. I feel this need to create a strong reputation so that when my little brother attends the schools I have attended, perhaps he will be protected from the ridicule because of my reputation; my reputation alone will keep him safe, at least I hope it will.<p>

I have always been an athletic person, so I wasn't really worried about the extraneous requirements of being a cheerleader. I am not worried about the extra pressure or stress of being a cheerleader; actually it will provide me with an escape from the stress of my home life. My parents encouraged me to try out for the cheer squad, they knew I needed something that would get me away from the house, something that I could do that would help be escape the reality of being at home.

I was disappointed to see that a lot of the girls and guys from my elementary school decided not to try out for the cheer squad. I was hoping that there would be an even amount of cheerleaders from each of the elementary schools that feed into the middle school, but only four of us tried out. My performance was flawless, I'm pretty sure I left the middle school coach and captains speechless; however, the high school coach had plenty to say to me. She went on and on about how she liked the attitude that I presented when I cheered, that I had potential, but that if I wanted to make the high school team I would have to work a lot harder and stop looking like an amateur. I am not even sure why this high school coach was watching try outs for the sixth grade cheer squad, but here she was, critiquing eleven year olds on not being an amateur. I'll show her one day, I will become the best cheerleader she has ever seen, and one day I will be her head cheerleader, the captain of her high school team.

My parents were proud when I told them that I made the team. They assured me that they would support my decision to become a cheerleader in every way possible and would buy me whatever supplies I needed for my new hobby. I hated that my parents called it a hobby, it made it seem insignificant to some degree. I feel like no matter how hard I try they're never proud of me, that I am never achieving enough for them. Cheerleading is not a hobby, it is a sport and will become my life, I will become defined by being a cheerleader; I wish they could see this. I know they are distracted; their thoughts are with my brother. Their thoughts are always with him, always worrying about the next surgery or the next illness. Sometimes I just feel like a mark on their expense sheet rather than their child. I know my brother needs them more, but I need them as well.

A few weeks after I made the team my parents had to attend this mandatory meeting. I wanted to attend the meeting with them but they needed me to stay home and watch my brother, since both of them wanted to attend. They told me that at the meeting they had to sign a bunch of forms, travel waivers, health insurance waivers, and participation waivers. They also ordered all of the required items. I had already done a fitting after I made the team so the coach had my size. My parents told me that a father of one of the cheerleaders from the other school had made a donation to the squad which was used to pay for some of the required gear. Even though the donation covered the cost of some gear, my parents still ordered double the recommended amount. They wanted to make sure that I would always have what I needed. That is one thing my parents have always done well, they always make sure that I have everything that I could ever need or want. My mom made sure there was always plenty of food in the house; she even made sure to have quick meal options in case I had to fix myself dinner. Sometimes my brother would become ill suddenly and she would have to take him to the hospital and dad would be at work so I would have to fend for myself. Of course my abuela was great at coming over and helping out. I loved spending time with her, we are so close because she has always been around to take care of me; we are definitely closer than I would say most people are with their grandmothers.

At the end of the meeting they were also informed that all the cheerleaders, who wished to remain on the team, were required to attend a week long cheer camp. The camp is scheduled to be held at the University of Northwestern Ohio. The university is located in Lima, but we have to meet at the area high school and ride buses over to the university. It seems like a complete waste of time and money but if this is what I have to do to be a cheerleader than I will not complain. Of course this bus ride will probably be awkward since there will only be two other kids from my school on the bus, and I really can't stand either of them. I'm still not sure how they even made the cheer squad. Nina is okay but she is not coordinated, she trips almost every day at school, you would think that after me sticking my foot into the aisle for the hundredth time she would learn to avoid it, but nope. Then there is Marcus, that boy is as dumb as a box of rocks. But he is not too bad to look at, I guess that is why I let him kiss me under the slide on the last day of school, that's what girls are suppose to do if they want to be popular, right?

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><p>I started packing for cheer camp three days ago. I had made my list of things to pack a week ago. One thing I have learned from my parents, and how they manage their lives and my brother, is that organization is key. With so many doctors' appointments and therapy sessions it is important to make lists, keep an up to date planner, and get everything you can completed in advance. The less you have to do the day of the event the better. I look over my list for like the tenth time this morning methodically checking off items once again. I know everything is in my cheer bag but nonetheless I feel this overwhelming need to make sure I pack a few extra items, just in case.<p>

I still have an hour before I need to leave for the high school and I have nothing to do. My cheer bag and back pack are packed and waiting by the door to be placed in my dad's truck, he offered to take me to the school today on his way to work. It is going to be so nice to be away from the house for a whole week. To be away from the stress and the worry and to just think about what I want to be doing. I love my little brother so much but sometimes it can be exhausting to be stuck in the house all the time. Finally, I will be able to get away and not have to worry about anything but learning a lot at cheer camp.

I open the folder in my lap that contains all of the information about cheer camp, my signed permission slip, and my dorm room assignment sheet. My roommate's name is Brittany S. Pierce, kinda sounds like a snooty rich girl's name. I guess I can't say much about being rich, I mean my parents are successful and wealthy professionals, but I still worry about this girl I will be rooming with. It is a good thing that I am not rooming with Nina because she would not have survived the week, she probably would have tripped out the dorm room window or something. I guess I will just have to wait and see, I'm sure this girl will be fine, and if not I will just have to use her as my first example to the rest of the squad as to why no one messes with Santana Lopez.

If I am thinking all of these things about this girl, I wonder what she is thinking about me. I mean Lima Heights does not have the best reputation, of course if she believes the rumors about Lima Heights I could totally use that to my advantage. I've never been in a real fight or do I go looking for fights but perhaps a hardened exterior is just what I need to personify in order to establish my popular image and a bad ass reputation.

"Santana sweetie, are you ready to go?"

"Yeah Dad, my stuff is by the door."

My dad is such a kind and gentle man. He can be stern and when I step out of line he is quick to correct my behavior. One of my biggest fears in life is to disappoint my parents, especially my dad. He does so much for our family and he works so hard, I just want to be as successful as he is. I love the time I get to spend alone with my dad. Unfortunately, we do not get enough alone time. He works a lot to be able to afford all of my brother's medical expenses and when he is off of work he is either sleeping or spending time with all of us. I love our family time but still, I love when it is just me and my dad; I feel like I am finally getting all of his attention, finally getting an opportunity to tell him about all I have achieved. I just want him to be proud of me!

The drive over to the high school is quiet. Dad and I talk a bit about cheer camp and he asks if I'm excited about starting middle school. He tells me that this is the time when I need to start taking school seriously and to learn proper study habits because they would only help me when I became a freshman in high school. Freshman year seems so far away, but I know he is right; it is freshman year when grades start to count for college. I always take school seriously, I love to learn; it is one of my passions in life. I hope my dad doesn't think that just because I'm a cheerleader that I will stop trying in school. Of course I'm not going to become a geek or a nerd I want to be popular but I will still try hard at being successful in school. I mean a girl with wit and brains, when used effectively, is super hot.

When we arrive at the high school, my dad helps me unload my cheer bag from the back of the truck. I'm too short to really reach into the bed and grab my bag. Thankfully my dad is wearing his blue hospital scrubs; I hope people realize that the blue scrubs are only worn by surgeons. Having a dad that is a surgeon should win me some popularity points with the other cheerleaders. I take my cheer bag from my dad and give him a quick hug and tell him thank you for the ride. He gives me a kind smile as he gets back into his truck and drives away. I'm glad that he dropped me off and left, because it is very uncool to have your parents stick around and watch over you like a hawk. I think he understands my desire to be popular.

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><p>There are random groups of cheerleaders gathered together near the waiting buses, all of whom are staring at the high school cheer coach who is wearing a red track suit and holding a bull horn. I recognize the lady from try outs, I'm pretty sure she was wearing a track suit that day as well. I wonder if she is obsessed with track suits. I arrive about ten minutes early, it seems like all the cheerleaders are here except for the sixth grade team. I find it interesting that so many of the cheerleaders are early; I'm use to being the only one being so early. I guess promptness is something that this cheer camp ingrains in the students. I sit on my cheer bag and watch as the sixth grade cheer leaders arrive, I can tell they are the sixth grade cheerleaders because they're all looking around with lost and confused expressions. As soon as Nina arrives she marches right over to me.<p>

I know Nina came over to me so that she will not feel like an outsider. Marcus arrives shortly after Nina and joins us. We casually discuss how our summer vacations are going and what we have been up to. I am really uninterested in what they have to say but I'm trying to be friendly, I'm going to be stuck with these people for a whole week. I can see across from us another small group of cheerleaders forming; clearly these are the sixth grade cheerleaders who were selected from the other elementary school. I don't pay much attention to this group of cheerleaders until a tall blonde girl joins them.

I don't know what it is about this girl but I cannot keep my eyes off of her. She is so pretty, I just want to walk up to her and introduce myself, which is weird because I never have this feeling. I like to be known, but I want people to want to know my name, to come up to me and ask me my name. I want people to want to be my friend. I like having this sense or presence about me that I'm almost untouchable, that it is their privilege to be allowed to speak to me. But this is different, I feel like I have to know this girl. I have to be her friend, I know nothing about her and I hate it because I want to know everything there is to know about her.

My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a booming voice over a mega phone. I instantly know it is the high school cheer coach. She is bellowing out instructions to all of the cheerleaders. Apparently she wants each squad to ride on separate buses, what a waste of money. The varsity squad rides on this super nice travel bus. This is ridiculous because the university campus is only about twenty minutes from the high school. I suppose the coach does this to try to impress the younger cheerleaders, so they will work harder at the camp. Everyone is envious of the varsity squad and wants to become a member of that squad one day. I know I do, so I guess this approach by the high school coach works. The sixth grade team is instructed to load onto the last bus in line. I am pretty sure this bus can't be safe to travel in, it looks worse than a decommissioned submarine from World War II. This bus ride is going to be pure torture.

I'm the first in line to load the bus. I may not be eager to get onto this death trap on wheels, but I want to show the high school coach that I'm dedicated to being a cheerleader and that I will do anything to be on her high school squad. Behind me is this shorter blonde girl, she is incessantly bragging about how her father made this huge donation to the cheer squad. She said her name is Quinn, I'm not sure what to think of this girl, but I do know that she will be my biggest competition for the head cheerleader title. I know I can outperform her but obviously she is willing to purchase her place on the team. You know the saying, "keep your friends close; keep your enemies closer." This will be my strategy when dealing with one Quinn Fabray. A few people behind her is Nina, and then right behind Nina is the tall blonde girl, my heart leaps when I see her standing there.

The high school coach methodically loads all the other buses, leaving the sixth grade squad for last. We are not allowed to load the bus without her permission. She stands in front of me, glaring at the sight of us. Her stare makes me feel small and insignificant. She reaches out her hand and requests my permission slip.

"You are rather timely, I see that you arrived before all of the middle school cheerleaders and before some of my varsity cheerleaders."

Her tone leads me to believe that she is impressed by my timely arrival; I give myself a mental high five as I step onto the bus. I make my way towards the back of the bus. This bus is so old that I want to sit as far away from the engine as possible, if that thing explodes I have no desire to be anywhere near it. I also hope that if I sat at the back of the bus then perhaps the tall blonde girl will sit by me I just have to know who she is. The sixth grade squad slowly loads the bus, looks of disgust on all of their faces; I'm not sure if the look is because they're also concerned with the condition of the bus or if it is because the high school coach had something insulting to them. Either possibility is highly likely. When the tall blonde steps up into the bus she wears a smile that is brighter than the sun. It's like her optimism pours from her. I don't understand how anyone can look so happy when stepping onto this death machine.

My heart pounds in anticipation as she walks down the aisle towards me. When our eyes lock I think my heart stops beating, a goofy smile spreads across the girl's face and I know that a similar smile is forming on my face. In that moment I feel like I have found something that has been missing in my life. It is the oddest feeling. But as quickly as the smile formed it disappears when Nina sits down next to me. I should've known she would do this. My eyes fall to the floor in disappointment. When I look up I see that the tall blonde sat next to Quinn. Just what I need the girl I want to know more than anyone else in the world sitting next to the girl I know will be my competition.

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><p>Nina begins chatting my ear off as soon as the bus lurches from its parked position. It is the most mundane and irritating conversation I have ever been forced to listen to, there is no way that I can handle twenty minutes on this bus stuck in this conversation. I smile at Nina and tell her that I just want to listen to some music to get into the proper mindset for the first day of cheer camp. She gives me a puzzled look. I guess she doesn't listen to music to pump her up, of course I'm not really listening to music to get pumped up I just need to stop her, to drown out her annoying voice.<p>

I'm so glad that I had downloaded new music onto my iPod shuffle the other morning. The new song by Ciara, "Oh" was blaring in my ears as the bus winds through the city streets towards the university. I sit staring out the window, praying that the rattling of the bus will stop soon because I'm starting to feel sick to my stomach. I didn't get car sick usually, but there was something about this bus that makes me feel queasy.

Watching the buildings blur by is only making me feel worse, I turn my gaze back to the occupants of the bus and that is when I notice the tall blonde girl staring at me. She looks inquisitive, like she is searching for an answer sketched across my face. I wonder if she and Quinn are talking negatively about me. Is she judging me, is she trying to decide if I'm a person worth knowing or not. I really hope she's not judging me, I hope she wants to get to know me because I want to know her. I offer her a kind smile hoping that she will reciprocate it. The girl smiles back and bounces in her seat as she turns back around. I wonder why she decided to turn around, but then I see her lean into Quinn. I can see that she and Quinn are engaged in a conversation, although from what I can see it looks more like she is listening while Quinn talks her ear off. It appears that Quinn is her Nina, but she is either too nice or not annoyed enough to put on headphones.

I can feel the bus slowing and have never felt relief flood through my body so quickly. My nausea has hit a peak and I'm pretty sure there is no way I can handle another minute on this bus. The bus pulls up and comes to a stop in front of the dorms. We're instructed by a parent volunteer; who rode on the bus with us, to stay seated until we're instructed by Sue. I assume Sue is the high school cheer coach. It is nice to finally have a name for her.

Moments later Sue steps onto the bus and begins hollering orders at us. She informs us all that we're to call her Coach Sylvester and that's the only way we are to address her. I quickly take a mental note of this and try to remove the name Sue from my vocabulary; I don't want to accidentally call her the improper name. Coach Sylvester instructs us to unload the bus, find our rooms, unpack, change, and be on the practice field in thirty minutes for conditioning. Nina's face drops when she hears the word conditioning, while Nina is thin, she's not what I would consider in shape. She is blessed with a naturally thin body type so she never really has to workout.

I suppose I am the same way but I do workout. I run all the time. I love to run, it's my escape. Whenever I need to clear my head I go for a run. I'm not worried about conditioning, I am pretty sure I will do better than anyone on the sixth grade squad, and probably all of the middle school squads. I'm not as confident with the high school squads because those squads are under Coach Sylvester's control all the time. Nonetheless, I will push myself until I physically cannot move, I will prove to Coach Sylvester that I'm worthy of being on her high school squad, even if I have to wait a few years, I will earn my stripes this week.

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><p>Before exiting the bus I send my mom a quick text letting her know that we've arrived at the university and that I would call her at the end of the day. My mom always wants to know when I've arrived at my destination and when I'll be contacting her again. She is such a worry wart. Of course with my little brother I understand why she worries all the time, she only has two children and one of them is always sick, so it only makes sense that she wants to know that her other child is okay. I like that she worries about me, about my safety, it reminds me that she is thinking about me and does care even if she is typically distracted with my brother.<p>

After sending the text off to my mom, I exit the bus and grab my cheer bag. According to my dorm room information I'm on the third floor of the building we are parked in front of. I waste no time, I don't want to be late to the practice field. As soon as I enter the building I notice that there is a line in front of the only elevator in the building. I don't have time to wait for the crowd to disperse and file into the elevator. I see the stairs to the left and decide to take them rather than wait for the elevator. When I reach the third floor, there's no one else there. I find my room and knock on the door just in case this Brittany girl is already in there. After hearing no response I crack the door open and find the room empty. Inside the room are two twin beds, two small dressers, two desks and one closet. Since I like to sleep with the window open I choose the bed closest to the window and place my stuff on it.

I quickly change into my workout clothes, a pair of yoga pants and a tank top with a built in sports bra, not that I really need a bra right now. I then slip on my running shoes and pull my hair up into a high pony, I noticed that all of the high school cheerleaders had their hair pulled up like this. When I look at my watch I realize that I it only took me five minutes to get to my room and change, so I decide to unpack all of my gear. I place some of my clothes in the dresser that is closest to my bed and then hang my uniforms in the closet. This process took another five minutes and my roommate still has not arrived. I wonder if she decided not to come to cheer camp, I guess having no roommate for the week will be better than having one I hate.

I still have twenty minutes before I need to be on the practice field, of course I still have to find the practice field and I want to stretch and loosen up before conditioning; being really early won't be that bad. I walk out of my room and notice that people are frantically searching the floor for their rooms. They look pathetic in their confusion. I hold my head up high knowing that I am better than these girls who could not even decipher the simple instructions on the dorm room assignment sheet. Once again the elevator is jam packed and appears to be slowly moving up and down the floors of the dorm, I opt for the stairs knowing that taking the stairs will be faster.

When I reach the main floor I see the tall blonde girl sitting on her cheer bag looking lost and sad. My smile fades when I see how sad this girl looks, it is like someone had drained all of the color from the world, this girl should never frown; her smile is too bright. I look around the entry way, there is no one else there. This is my opportunity; I need to know her name. As I approach her, she lifts her head and our eyes lock. She has the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. Her eyes are as blue as the sky; that gorgeous blue color of the sky on a clear summer day; the kind of blue that warms you from the inside out.

I have no idea what to say to this girl so I simply ask her if she is okay. I think my question startles her because she looks at me with this sense of confusion. She shakes her head no and I can't help but want to fix what's wrong. I kink my head to the side and ask if she is lost and if she would like some help finding her room. She eagerly nods her head yes. My pulse flutters with her excitement. I ask her for her dorm room assignment sheet, unfortunately she lost the paperwork. I can't help but smile at the sweet expression of embarrassment that creeps across her face. Finally, I have a way to find out her name without looking like all I want to know is her name.

"Well, what's your name? We can ask the others if they are rooming with you, or do you remember who you are rooming with?"

"My name is Brittany, I'm supposed to room with Santana Lopez, do you know her?"

I can't believe my luck, this girl that I've wanted to introduce myself to since the first time I saw her face is going to be my roommate, for a whole week. A smile spreads across my face as I nod in response to her question. When I realize that I have failed to verbally respond to her, a light blush floods my face.

"Actually, that's me. Here let me help you with your bag and I'll show you where our room is."

I offer her my hand to help her stand up and then reach for her bag. I'm not sure what all she packed in her bag but I can't believe how heavy it is. I walk towards the elevator, there's no longer a line waiting for it and with the weight of her bag, I feel it is necessary to take the elevator. I push the button for the elevator and the door instantly opens; a flood of relief washes over me, I really don't want to be late for conditioning.

We step into the elevator and I push the button for the third floor, Brittany smiles at me, I can tell she's grateful that I offered to help her. Little does she know how grateful I am that she is my roommate. When the elevator reaches the third floor and the door opens, I gesture for Brittany to exit the elevator first, she does this cute little skipping hop as she exists the elevator; she has to be the most adorable person I've ever seen. I follow behind her half carrying half dragging her bag, it's really heavy. She turns around and sees me struggling with the weight of her bag, I try to hide my struggling but it's too late. She reaches out and takes part of the bag and lifts it, together we carry her bag down the hall.

I stop in front of our dorm room and the bag jerks out of my hand and crashes to the floor as Brittany has continued to walk down the hall. I guess I should have led the way down the hall rather than following behind her. She turns around quickly giggling in embarrassment.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to stop so suddenly but this is our room."

I blushed saying "our room" I don't know why I'm having this reaction but there is something about Brittany. I just really want her to be my friend; I've never wanted someone to like me this much. She offers me another smile, I love her smile. I open our dorm room door and once again gesture for her to enter first.

Without hesitation she pulls her bag onto the bed closest to the door and dumps the contents of the bag onto the bed. I'm pretty sure she must have randomly thrown stuff into her bag because the contents spread across the bed look like a jumbled mess of clothes and beauty supplies. I laugh at the mental image of Brittany running around her room randomly stuffing things into her bag, no wonder the thing is so heavy.

I sit on the bed across from her as she frantically moves things from the bed and into the dresser drawers or hanging in the closet. Once she has put all of her stuff away which only took about three minutes she grabs some shorts and a tank top from her dresser and changes her clothes. I stare out the window as she changes, I don't want her to think that I'm watching her change like some kind of perv, although I can still see her distorted reflection in the window. Even distorted she is beautiful.

Lost in my own world, I'm startled when Brittany taps me on the shoulder. I turn to see her wearing a hot pink polka dot tank top and a pair of neon green track shorts with knee high tube socks that have alternating hot pink and neon green stripes. This girl has the craziest fashion sense I've ever seen and I love it. Brittany asks if I'm ready to go, I nod my head and look at my watch. It has only taken seven minutes for us to get up to our room, get her unpacked, and for her to change. We still have plenty of time to make it to the practice field on time; early in fact which is even better.

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><p>The practice field is a five minute walk from the dorms, I'm glad I had looked up where all the fields are located on the campus last week just in case. Brittany and I arrive at the practice field eight minutes early, most of the high school cheerleaders are already there but none of the middle school cheerleaders are there. The majority of the cheerleaders are just standing around talking to each other, this feels like a waste of time.<p>

"Hey Brit, do you wanna stretch out before conditioning?"

"Uh, yeah. You should never workout before stretching!"

Brittany nods her head eagerly at my question. There is such enthusiasm in her response; it's like I have asked her if she wants to go to a concert as excited as she is. It's obvious that Brittany is an athletic person, she starts stretching and curving her body in ways I would have thought physically impossible. She is certainly limber; no wonder she made the cheer squad. As soon as I sit down in the grass, Brittany sits across from me and places the bottom of her feet up against the bottom of my feet. She reaches out and I take hold of her hands. She pulls me towards her and I can feel the pull of my muscles in my thighs and back; it feels amazing to be stretched like this. When she releases her pull, I pull her towards me; she smiles at me as her body stretches.

Our stretching is interrupted by the sound of a bull horn. Brittany and I leap to our feet and direct our attention to Coach Sylvester. She is standing on a platform that is raised at least fifteen feet into the air.

"Sorry sack of rejects! When I say thirty minutes you should know I mean twenty–five minutes. You have wasted five minutes of my precious time by being late. Everyone will pay for your tardiness. Get on that track, all of you, and run until I tell you to stop!"

I look at Brittany, who is wearing an expression of utter shock and disbelief. I shrug at her and whisper to her "at least we were early, we're not to blame for this." All of the other cheerleaders look at the sixth grade squad who has just arrived, while on time according to the thirty minute schedule everyone hates them. I've never been so thankful for my timely arrival. Brittany links her pinkie in mine and pulls me towards the track. I like how she takes my pinkie, it is like she is promising that she will not stop running until I stop, that we will keep each other going and protect each other from Coach Sylvester.

It feels like we have been running forever. My tank top is soaked with sweat; I look to my left and see that Brittany's tank top is also soaked. I gaze over to the field and see that the majority of the cheerleaders have stopped running and are on their hands and knees heaving. When I look at my watch I notice that we have been running for forty-five minutes without stopping. The entire varsity squad is still running, along with half of the junior varsity squad, a couple of boys from the middle school squads, Brittany and I. This display should certainly help with my bid for cheer captain of the sixth grade squad.

Fifteen minutes later the bull horn sounds. I don't want to look weak so I slow to a light jog to cool down my legs; apparently it's the right decision because the varsity squad does the same thing. Brittany and I jog around the track, following the lead of the varsity squad. Five minutes later the bull horn sounds again and the varsity squad jogs over to where Coach Sylvester is standing on her raised platform. Brittany and I follow, when we are about a hundred feet from the platform Brittany, apparently decides, a foot race to the finish is a fun way to end our run. Even though my legs are beyond dead, I can't pass up a foot race. We sprint the last hundred feet and reach the platform at the exact same time, which I am not sure how that is possible because Brittany's legs are insanely long compared to mine.

"A tie" she exclaims, perhaps a little too loudly.

"I like your enthusiasm keep up that spunk legs!"

I am glad that Coach Sylvester praises Brittany's attitude rather than insult her. Brittany's attitude is contagious and wonderful; I'd hate to see someone belittle her for being such a special person.

"I want everyone that stopped running before the sound of the horn to step over here to my left. All of you that just stopped, at the appropriate time, step over here to my right."

I link my pinkie with Brittany's and pull her towards the right side of the platform. She smiles at me as my pinkie wraps around her pinkie, I'm not sure what the significance of the pinkie link is to her but I want her to know that I pinkie promise to her to never let her fail. It feels amazing to make a bond with someone so quickly; I hope she feels the same.

"Congratulations to those of you who have earned the chance to stand on the right side of God, the rest of you are a disgrace to cheerleading! I suggest that when we return after lunch you plan on actually participating fully in this camp or you can pack your gear and leave. If you are not going to put in your best effort here there is no need for you to remain a cheerleader."

Did she really just call herself a God? Clearly impressing this woman is going to take work, I'm not only going to have to do everything she asks of me but also those things that she may ask of me. Great to be a head cheerleader I'm going to have to think like a crazy person with a God complex. I look over to Brittany and she is giving me a look of true confusion. I hope Brittany realizes that Coach Sylvester isn't actually a God; well I suppose she is a God in the cheerleading world. She had recently won her first national championship last year and her current squad is favored to win this year as well.

"You have two hours for lunch and to rest up, if you are so weak that you need rest, before I expect you back on this field!"

My legs are quivering under me, I need to stretch them out and cool them down a bit more or they are going to cramp up. I look to Brittany and she is staring at the ground like she is unsure what she is going to do.

"Hey Britt, I need to stretch out and cool down a bit more, do you wanna join me and then we can go get lunch?"

Brittany's head jolts up and her eyes lock with mine as she eagerly nods. I love how excited she gets about things. She is like a five year old in a toy store, the simplest of things, like a new toy, makes her so excited. We jog the track four times, completing a nice mile cool down and then sit in the middle of the field as we stretch each other's legs out. I can see in the distance Coach Sylvester standing on her platform watching us. I try not to look at her; I don't want her to notice that I'm interested in her attention, because that might result in receiving negative attention from her. After we stretch out and once my legs no longer feel like a bowl of Jell-O, I stand-up and offer my hand to Brittany to help her stand up.

Brittany takes my hand and leaps to her feet. When she is on her feet she changes her grip from holding my hand to simply linking her pinkie with mine. I really like the way her pinkie links with mine, it feels like it's always belonged there. We start to walk off the field when we hear Coach Sylvester summoning us over the bull horn. Not wanting to get on the left side of "God," Brittany and I change our direction and walk over to Coach Sylvester. We reach the platform just as Coach Sylvester takes her final step off of the platform.

"What are your names?"

Brittany and I both state our names to Coach Sylvester. She quickly looks over the lists on her clipboard until she finds our names and makes a few notes before looking back up at us.

"Keep up what you are doing and you may find yourselves privileged enough to be Cheerios one day."

While not completely a compliment, I assume that's about the best I'll ever get out of Coach Sylvester. She marches off; her march is the most awkward looking thing I have ever seen. Brittany tugs on my pinkie and pulls me in the opposite direction. When we reach a parking lot I'm pretty sure Brittany has no idea where she is going.

"Hey Britt, where are we going?"

"Apparently the parking lot. Where do you think we need to go for lunch?"

I couldn't help but laugh at Brittany's stating the obvious humor. After thinking about where we are and trying to remember the university map I looked up last week, I walk Brittany and I towards the campus dining hall. Thankfully, the dining hall is located next to the dorm we're staying in. Brittany and I have already spent thirty minutes of our two hour break and I want to be back on the practice field at least twenty minutes early, so we have an hour and ten minutes to eat and relax.

Even though I should be hungry, the hour long run made me pretty queasy and since I had no idea the type of work out to expect when we return to the practice field, I opt to eat light. I walk over to the salad bar and partially filled my plate with a healthy salad. I then grab a Gatorade and a bottle of water to have with my lunch. I definitely need to rehydrate. Brittany must have the same thoughts, as she grabs exactly the same thing.

Brittany and I sit down at the same table, across from one another and quietly eat our lunch. I scan the lunch room and notice that the varsity squad is the only squad sitting together, and also the only squad eating salads. Even the boys on the varsity squad are eating salads. Everyone else is scattered throughout the dining hall. The three boys on the sixth grade squad are eating together; they're downing slices of pizza. My stomach turns watching how much pizza these boys are devouring. Nina is sitting with four other girls; I don't know any of them. I guess they all had time to become friends while Brittany and I ran around the track. As I look around the dining hall I notice that Quinn is missing.

Twenty minutes later Brittany and I exit the dining hall. We both grab another Gatorade and bottle of water before leaving. Neither of us had taken something to drink to conditioning, which was not a good idea. We still have fifty minutes before we need, or rather I want, to be back on the practice field. Last week when I was researching the university campus, I remember seeing that there is this open area, near a reflection pond, on the campus where students go to study. I link Brittany's pinkie and lead her in the direction of the reflection pond. She squeezes my pinkie and follows me without question; I love how she seems to trust me so freely.

It takes us five minutes to walk to the reflection pond. When we arrive I sit down near the pond and lie down on my back looking up at the clouds. Once I'm comfortable I set an alarm on my watch to go off in forty minutes. I feel kind of geeky for having a watch with an alarm but it doesn't look like a geeky watch, like me this watch hides its geeky features well. Brittany lies down next to me and looks over at me and then up at the clouds.

"Look that one looks like a duck."

I stare up at the clouds and can't find a cloud that looks like a duck. I cock my head to the left and then the right. I squint and even try to open my eyes wide. No matter how I look at the clouds I can't see a duck. Brittany must see my confusion; she reaches over and grabs my hand.

"Here look," she raises our hands and traces the duck cloud with my pointer finger, "do you see it now?"

I nod my head. She has the most amazing imagination, the whole time I was looking for a cloud that looked like a real duck but the cloud she traced looks like a rubber ducky. I laugh at myself for thinking inside the box; Brittany is definitely an outside the box thinker. This is exactly the quality I like about her. Brittany is completely outside the box.

I wear boring black and white workout clothes, research campus maps a week in advance, make check lists and pack with precision. Whereas, Brittany wears neon colored workout clothes, randomly wonders around the campus unsure of where she is going to end up but confident in the direction she is heading, and just crams stuff into her bags when packing but making sure to pack everything she may need. She is everything I am not and I am everything she is not, together we are like the ultimate person.

* * *

><p>This has been the longest week of my life! I have not been able to really feel my legs for two days now; prior to that my legs had been in excruciating pain, now they're just numb. Brittany and I slowly climb the stairs to our dorm room; we have thirty minutes before we need to be in the dining hall for Coach Sylvester's "end of cheer camp speech." I'd rather crawl into bed and sleep until it is time to load the bus in the morning but I know that if I want head cheerleader I have to attend this speech.<p>

I feel like Brittany and I are hands down the best cheerleaders on the squad, we have finished every workout, we are always the first ones there and the last ones to leave. Quinn may have us beat on peppiness but other than that we crush everything else. For some reason though I'm nervous about Quinn, she is never around at lunch and one day Brittany and I saw her chatting up the head coach of the middle school squads as well as Coach Sylvester. I know she is up to no good.

When Brittany and I reach our room we slump down onto Brittany's bed. I am exhausted. I stand up and make my way to dresser, I have no desire to stay in these sweaty gross clothes another second. I pull out a clean outfit and lay it out on my bed while Brittany watches.

"Hey S, I have a question for ya."

"What is it Brittany?"

"Do you want to have a movie night with me?"

This seems like an odd question, since our first night here, Brittany and I have watched a movie at the end of the day on my DVD player. Thankfully I brought enough movies to last the entire week without having to repeat any; I prepared for a boring movie watching week in case I had an awful roommate. But I don't have an awful roommate, I have Brittany and she is the best roommate.

"What I mean, is like, do you wanna push our beds together and like build a fort and watch a movie tonight, since it is our last night here and I don't know when I will be able to see you again before school starts."

She is perfect! Everything I want in a best friend and more.

"That sounds like a perfect way to spend our last night."

Brittany bounces up onto her knees and claps at my answer. Her perfection continues. She squeaks one last time before hopping off her bed. She runs over to me and gives me a giant bear hug and the walks over to her cheer bag. We both quickly freshen up and change our clothes before heading back downstairs and over to the dining hall.

Once again we are the first members of the sixth grade squad to arrive. Tonight the dining hall is set-up a little differently, instead of choosing to eat whatever we want the kitchen has made specific meals and are serving the tables. Each squad is divided into two groups and the groups are assigned different tables to sit at. Brittany and I are both assigned to the sixth grade "A" table. Also assigned to our table are Quinn, Samantha, and David. I'm the only one from my elementary school at the "A" table but I have Brittany now so it doesn't matter. It seems odd that out of the fifteen members that make up our squad only five of us are at one table and the other ten are at the other table. I am glad not to be at the "B" table because it is going to be crowded and being left-handed really makes eating at circular tables tricky.

Brittany and I look for our name cards on the table and I'm delighted to discover that we're sitting next to each other; I guess others have noticed that we are attached at the hip. Forty-five minutes later we have finished our meals and are becoming restless. Coach Sylvester must have noticed the restlessness flooding through the dining hall because she stands from the coach's table and walks to the middle of the room. She raises her bull horn, I'm pretty sure that thing is attached to her hip, it's like her Brittany.

"Alright, listen up you worthless sack of maggots. Everyone sitting at an 'A' table, nice work this week you're on your way to be good enough to make it as a Cheerio. For those of you sitting at a 'B' table you should just quit cheerleading, you're an utter disgrace to the sport. If you opt to continue this futile endeavor I recommend you look to your counterparts at the 'A' tables and learn what hard work actually looks like. Do not come back to my camp next year in such disgracing style!"

Wow, Coach Sylvester doesn't pull any punches. I look over to the sixth grade "B" table and can see that half of the girls are in tears including Nina. I almost feel bad for them, almost. This has been a week from hell, I'm pretty sure Coach Sylvester can run a Marine Hell Week and make plenty of Marines cry and drop out. But I've earned my position at the "A" table and I know I deserve to be here. Coach Sylvester turns her attention to the varsity squad and announces the name of the new Cheerios captain. Applause fills the dining hall.

My pulse begins to race as Coach Sylvester makes her way through the dining hall telling the name of the new captain for each squad. I feel Brittany grasp my leg, probably to steady my nervous bouncing, as Coach Sylvester approaches our table.

"Now the sixth grade team is a little tricky. I have seen a lot from this team and I know that some of you will become Cheerios and will win a national title. I believe that some of you are willing to do whatever it takes to be number one and I like that quality in my Cheerios; it is a quality that I myself possess. That being said I'm making a unique decision for this squad. This year the sixth grade team will have a head cheerleader and three captains. I want to explain this to you a bit. All three captains will assist with creating routines and judging tryouts for next year's squad. However, the head cheerleader will have the final say in any split voting. The three captains are Quinn Fabray, Santana Lopez, and Brittany Pierce, quite the trinity I must say."

Brittany and I have done it, we have proven ourselves to Coach Sylvester and she is rewarding us for it. Now I just need that title of head cheerleader; I want the icing on top.

"I also want each of you to be responsible for unique aspects of the team. Santana your work ethic is insane; you're in charge of scheduling, workouts, conditioning, etc. Brittany you have moves that would make J. Lo stumble, you're in charge of creating dance routines and song selection. Quinn you have inspired spirit, you're in charge of creating cheers and yells."

Coach Sylvester is dragging this announcement out painfully slow. I have taken hold of Brittany's hand on my leg and I'm pretty sure that I'm squeezing it so hard that it may break. As soon as I loosen my grip Brittany squeezes my leg even tighter, I think she may want this for me even more than I want it for me. She told me days ago that being a captain or head cheerleader doesn't matter to her; she is doing this because she wants to make friends and she has already accomplished that goal. I love that the friendship we have established is good enough for her to consider her goal accomplished.

"The head cheerleader for the sixth grade squad is Quinn Fabray. That's it people, get to bed, buses leave at nine am sharp, if you're late you will be left behind!"

My face falls and my heart sinks. I wanted head cheerleader so badly and have worked so hard for it. I quickly recover my expression and put a smile on; I don't want everyone to see my disappointment. I congratulate Quinn on her new position and reassure her that Brittany and I have her back and that together we will create the best squad in the state. Brittany nods along to everything I said. After we congratulate everyone and are congratulated in return; Brittany and I leave the dining hall and head back to our dorm room.

* * *

><p>As soon as I step into our dorm room I feel Brittany's arms wrap around me. It is the softest hug I have ever received. I instantly feel comforted and supported.<p>

"I'm so sorry S, I thought you had it for sure. You worked so hard, you deserved it."

"It's okay Britt, I'm pretty sure Quinn bought the position and I never want to earn something that way. We all work for things in different ways; Quinn just does it with her daddy's wallet, no biggie. I'm a captain and that's good enough, especially since I get to be a captain with you!"

Of course I am disappointed and I know Brittany can tell that I am but I don't want to ruin our last night at cheer camp. Plus it would be okay, Quinn may have the final say but I have Brittany's vote along with mine so we'll be okay. I'll just make sure to befriend Quinn and together we will rule the squad and the school together. What did Coach Sylvester call us, oh yeah a trinity. We will be one hell of a trinity, an unholy trinity at that.

Brittany looks at me with a sadden face as I walk away from her and towards the night stand that rests between the two beds. When she sees me moving the nightstand she gives me this adorably inquisitive look. I continue my work knowing that she will catch on to what I am doing, as soon as she remembers what she asked earlier. Once I start to scoot my bed towards hers she jumps up and down in excitement.

"I almost forgot S. I am so glad you remembered."

Brittany and I push the beds together and use some extra blankets to build a dome type cover over the bed. I am really not sure how she is able to create this fort but she does it; another Brittany skill, fort building. We snuggle up to each other as I put in the "Pacifier." I have never really snuggled with another person before, I really like it, or maybe it's just because it is Brittany. Before the movie starts I send my mom a quick text letting her know when I will be at the high school so she will know when to pick me up. The movie starts playing and I start feeling sleepy.

"Hey S?" Brittany nudges me waking me from my sleepy state.

"Yeah Britt?"

"Can I have your number so we can talk and maybe hang out this summer?"

How have I not thought about giving Brittany my phone number? I plan everything out and am always the first person to think about important things like this. I mean this morning I spent our free time packing my bag neatly and then switched to Brittany's stuff and packed it as neatly as possible considering the infinite amount of stuff she has.

"Of course you can Britt, but only if I get yours as well."

Brittany hands me her cell phone and I text myself a quick message and sent it to my number. When my phone receives the message I text her a quick message and hit send. Now we have each other's phone number. I nestle my head back down onto her shoulder and fall asleep in a matter of minutes.

* * *

><p>In the morning I wake up on my left side facing the window of the dorm room and Brittany is lying right behind me. Her body following the curve of my body; I'm so comfortable I don't want to move. Unfortunately, the blaring of my alarm brings with it the reminder that I have to get up and get ready to leave. Thankfully all the packing is finished we just have to return the room to its pre-fort building condition, get dressed, and eat breakfast before loading onto the bus. I roll over to face Brittany, she looks like sleeping beauty as she takes soft breathes in, I hate to wake her but we have to get up if we are going to make it to the bus on time. She stirs for a moment wiping the sleep from her eyes. When she opens her big blue eyes and looks at me I can't help but smile.<p>

We both get up and rearrange the room, giggling as we try to put everything back perfectly, I'm pretty sure that I am way more concerned about everything being back in its perfect place than Brittany is. Once the room is restored to its original condition Brittany and I get dressed, grab our things, and head down to breakfast. It's a great morning but as time wears on the realization that Brittany and I will be separating for the first time in a week hits and I instantly feel sad. I'm not ready to go home, not that I want to continue at this cheer camp from hell, I'm just not ready to leave Brittany.

The bus ride to the high school is quiet and solemn. Brittany and I sit next to each other and instinctively she wraps her pinkie around mine. Brittany leans into me and places her head on my shoulder. We ride the entire way to the high school in silence. I cannot help but feel like I will be leaving my best friend when we arrive at the high school.

The bus comes to a stop in front of the high school and I can see my mom waiting patiently next to her car.

"Hey S, you're my best friend and I'm going to miss you."

My heart leaps in excitement when I hear Brittany utter these words. She does feel the same way I feel; we have become best friends.

"Me too, Britt. I'll text you though and maybe we can go back to school shopping or something. I'll talk to my mom about it."

"That sounds like a great idea S."

We step off the bus and gather our cheer bags. I give Brittany a hug goodbye and we walk in opposite directions towards our parents' cars. As I place my cheer bag into my mom's car's trunk I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket. I remove my phone and read the text message, _"Hey bestie, don't forget me! Miss you already, can't wait to go shopping! Let's get matching backpacks!"_

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><p><em><strong>Hey readers! I did not have a BETA to review this chapter. If you would like to BETA this story message me. I do have one BETA already but she is super busy so I am looking to take on another BETA. Hope you enjoyed the chapter.<strong>_

_**Initially I posted only one story with both POV's. I have decided that it may be confusing for readers if I continue with it in such a way. There are now two stories:**_

_**My Love for Him Led Me to You – written from Santana's POV**_

_**Your Love for Him Led You to Me – written from Brittany's POV**_

_**These are the comments from the story when the two POV's were part of one story. (I don't want my readers to think that I do not value their reviews, because I do).**_


	2. Chapter 2: I Trust You

Chapter 2 – I Trust You September 2005

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><p>My summer wore on without too much excitement. Brittany and I were able to hang out a lot, but always at her house. I trust her, I really do but I want to protect my brother and I fear how people may react when they met him. I don't want to hide him I just want to keep him safe and sheltered from the cruelty of the world. I know Brittany is not cruel, she is amazing. I just need to ease into being comfortable with letting her in all the way. We all keep secrets from people, but I do want to let her in.<p>

Brittany and I are going shopping for back to school clothes and supplies today. I'm very excited to go shopping it is one of my favorite things to do. Brittany's mom offered to drive us around. My dad gave me a credit card this morning to use on the shopping trip. My parents signed me onto their account shortly after my brother was diagnosed so that I would always have access to money in case they had to rush out of town or something. My parents always tried to schedule appointments that are out of town in advance so they can make arrangements with where I will stay, but they also know that they need to plan for any and all emergency situations.

We're going shopping around noon today, I would have slept in this morning but my little brother was sick and my mom needed me to get up early and help her with him. She needed to give him a bath and wash his bedding. Once she had him in the bathtub she asked me to sit with him and make sure he didn't roll over in the water while she put his bedding in the washer. He loves his baths. I love just watching him get excited over such a simple thing. He is not able to sit up in the bath tub, so he lies down in the bathtub and splashes his arms in the water. Last Christmas I bought him this really neat package of bath toys. He likes playing with them. There's a duck, a frog, and a fish. I squeeze the frog under the water and the frog fills with water. Then I raise the frog out of the water and squeeze it shooting a stream of water at my brother's belly. He laughs hard as the water forcefully bounces off of his stomach. His muscles tighten. I can see each of his ribs and the outline of each of his stomach muscles. He is very small and thin. No matter what my parents do he doesn't gain weight.

The doctors are concerned about his low weight and are proposing a few different options to my parents for them to consider. It's hard to watch them battle with these decisions but there's nothing I can do to alleviate their stress. I guess this is why I try hard to never disappoint them. I do my best and try to be everything they want me to be; they deserve to have a child that does not cause them stress.

I hear my mom's feet padding down the hallway towards the bathroom. She walks in and gives my brother and me a gentle smile. She walks out of the bathroom and I can hear her open the linen closet in the hallway. I assume she's grabbing fresh sheets and blankets for my brother's bed. A few minutes later my mom walks back into the bathroom with a huge fluffy towel. It's perfect timing because my brother is starting to look like a wrinkled prune and the bath water is getting a little too cool. I take the towel from my mom and hold it open while she lifts my brother from the bathtub. She places him between my arms and I hold him up while she wraps the towel around him. Then she takes him from my arms and carries him to his room.

"Do you need anything else mom?"

"Will you just grab a diaper and pick out something nice for your brother to wear, please."

I like picking out clothes for my brother to wear. While my outfit choices might be boring compared to what Brittany would pick out, I still enjoy getting clothes for him; I feel like it gives me this opportunity to help my brother look cool. I know it sounds odd, but he has this amazing personality and attitude about him, he deserves to look just as amazing. I take the diaper and outfit over to my mom and watch as she dresses him. I stand by just in case she needs help, sometimes it can be difficult to get his arms into his shirts, of course I chose a button down so that does make it a bit easier.

"Thanks for your help sweetie. Do you have everything ready to go shopping today? Did dad give you the credit card? Do you know how long you will be out for today; will you be home for dinner?"

My mom always asks a million questions all at once. I honestly don't know how long Brittany and I will be out shopping, as long as it takes I suppose. I also don't know if I will be home for dinner I assume I will be because Brittany and I haven't discussed getting dinner when we talked on the phone last night.

"No problem Mom. I am ready to go but Brittany and her mom won't be here to pick me up until noon. Dad gave me the credit card before he left for work this morning. To be honest I don't know how long we will be out today but I will text you and let you know, same goes for dinner."

"Okay, just let me know. Dad and I were thinking about just getting take out tonight so I just need to know if I need to order food for you and what you'll want."

I nod at my mom and leave my brother's room. She is distracted feeding him his medicine; we have to disguise his medicine in pudding to get him to take it. It's quite the task. Certain pills have to be split in half because he only gets half a dosage in the morning and half at night. Then those pills have to be crushed. Other medications are capsules that have to be opened and dumped into the pudding. Some of the medicines in the capsules have to be further crushed and others cannot be crushed because they are a time release medication. It is a complicated process, I hate when my parents both have to work in the morning and I have to give my brother his medicine because my abuela can't remember the process. I always worry I'm doing something wrong or that I'm going to overdose my brother or not give him enough and then he will have a seizure or something. Of course I check the medication bottles numerous times just to make sure that I have the proper dosage of each.

I spend the rest of the morning cleaning my room and separating my laundry, I even complete a few loads of laundry. My mom use to do my laundry but with everything else she has to take care of I have started doing my own laundry. I finish vacuuming my bedroom and notice that it is eleven fifty. I go to my bathroom and freshen up. I don't want to go to the mall smelling like cleaner and carpet fresh. As I am drying my hands I hear my doorbell ring, I know it is Brittany. I grab my purse from my desk and rush to the front door.

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><p>When I open my front door I see Brittany displaying a giant smile and wearing this adorable sun dress. She is always in such a fantastic mood. As soon as I see her I can feel my spirits lift and the stress of my morning melt away. I know my mom's stress is a hundred times worse than mine but still when my brother gets ill I can't help but feel stressed by the situation.<p>

Brittany opens her mom's car door for me; I climb in and instinctively slide across the back seat. My subconscious cue that I want Brittany to sit next to me works; Brittany slides in right next to me. I laugh at the thought of Brittany's mom driving us around like a chauffeur. Her mom is just as sweet as Brittany, I don't know how this family manages to be crazy optimistic but I love it. Brittany fastens her seat belt and links her pinkie with mine. Our pinkies are always linked when we are together, ever since we created the gesture at cheer camp. We have never discussed each other's motivation for linking pinkies but words are not needed. It just feels right to have her pinkie tightly clasped with mine.

As we pull out of my driveway Brittany leans into the front seat, smiles at her mom, and cranks up the car stereo. We sing and dance as her mom drives through the town. The windows are rolled down, the sun roof is open, and even Brittany's mom is humming along with us and occasionally dancing. They are very much alike; they both have long blonde hair, sparkling blue eyes, fair skin, and long legs. Looks are not their only similarities; Brittany is like a mirror image of her mother, but somehow uniquely special. There is this mystical characteristic about her that I can't explain.

Fifteen minutes later we are pulling into the mall parking lot. I never asked my parents if I had a budget to stick to today, so I send my mom a quick text asking her how much I'm limited to spending. By the time we reach a parking spot my phone vibrates in my pocket. I remove my phone and read my mom's text. She tells me to just get whatever I feel I need and not to worry about money, but not to buy any, what she calls, big ticket items. A big ticket item is anything that costs over a hundred dollars. I can't think of a single item I'll want to buy that will be over a hundred dollars, maybe shoes.

Brittany excitedly skips through the parking lot dragging me with her. I would skip along but people are starring at us and I really don't like the odd looks they are giving me. I like attention, I like people noticing me, but I want them to notice me for certain things and this situation is not one of those things. I let my pinkie slip from Brittany's and slow down my pace to a walk. Brittany stops in her tracks and turns to face me. Her expression drips of hurt. I feel awful for causing her to hurt.

"What's wrong S? Why did you let go?"

"It's nothing B, I just want to walk."

I can't tell Brittany that I don't like the way she was excitedly skipping towards the mall, because I do, I adore her excitement. I just don't want people scrutinizing me. So I lie to her, for the first time in our friendship, I have now lied to my best friend. My heart aches with my lie but I know it is better than hurting her feelings with the truth. I trust that I can tell her the truth and she'll understand but I don't want to risk her changing who she is for me. She is perfect the way she is and shouldn't change for anyone.

Thankfully, Brittany believes my lie; she stops skipping and slows her pace re-linking her pinkie with mine. We walk into the mall and stop at the mall directory. I know what stores are in the mall and where all the stores are located but I have no idea where Brittany will want to go.

"So Britt, where to first?"

Brittany takes a moment and methodically scans the directory. She runs her finger up and down the lists of stores and food places. Her finger stops on the board as a giant smile spreads across her face. I look to where she is pointing, she is precious. I tighten my grip around her pinkie and pull her in the direction of the pretzel counter. I'm glad she chose food first because I didn't eat lunch before leaving my house and I'm starving. Brittany's mom orders us each a pretzel with nacho cheese sauce for dipping and fresh squeezed lemonade while Brittany and I find a table. We sit in the food court and enjoy our lunch.

"Okay Britt, now where do you wanna go?"

"I don't care S, wherever you want to go?"

I look to Brittany's mom to see if there is anywhere she wants to go, she offers me a quick shoulder shrug. It appears that Peirce clan is indifferent when it comes to choosing where to shop. I, however, have a list of stores I want to go to, which also contains an accompanying list that details what items I want from each store. When we finish our pretzels I throw away our garbage and then link my pinkie with Brittany's pulling in her the direction of the first store.

Four hours later Brittany and I have successfully finished our back to school clothes shopping but we still had to buy school supplies. There really isn't a store in the mall for school supplies. I did have to send my mom a picture message while shopping to get approval to buy a pair of shoes and a pair of jeans, each of them cost more than a hundred dollars so I wanted to make sure she was okay with me buying them. Both times she gave the sweetest response; she just said they look great sweetie of course you can get them. As we walk to the car I send my mom a message telling her that we had just finished clothes shopping and we're going to get supplies now. She sent a text back asking if I'm going to be home for dinner. It is already past four thirty; my dad will be getting home soon and will be hungry.

I don't want to invite myself over to Brittany's for dinner or anything or make her mom feel responsible for feeding me but I need to know if I should tell my mom to get me something for dinner or not. Brittany's mom is walking a few feet behind us so I figure I can just ask Brittany without her mom overhearing us.

"Hey Britt, what are your plans this evening?"

"Well, I'm hoping you can stay the night, I haven't asked my mom yet, I wanted to know if you wanted to before I asked her. We haven't really had a sleepover since cheer camp and that wasn't really a sleep over."

"I'll have to ask my mom to make sure it is okay with her but I really do want to!"

Right before Brittany and I reach the car, the car's trunk pops open. As we place our bags into the trunk, Brittany's mom comes up behind us and places the bags in her hands into the trunk.

"Well ladies, it looks like we did a lot of damage today! Britt-bee, your father would be shocked if he saw this trunk."

"Mom?"

"Yes sweetie"

"I'm wondering if it would be okay if Santana stays the night?"

Brittany looks up at her mom with these huge puppy dog eyes and pouts her lip. I take it she uses this technique to get her way, it always works for me. When Brittany's mom's eyes shift to me I give her my best puppy eye, pouty lip combination I can muster. She laughs at us.

"Oh, you two! You're too perfect for each other. You'll be the death of me, but of course it is okay for Santana to stay the night so long as her parents are okay with it. I take it that this idea was recently hatched since Santana did not come with overnight stuff."

We nod our heads in response to her question. I think Brittany has been planning this sleepover in her heard since we made arrangements to go shopping but today is the first time she shared this idea with me. Brittany's mom smiles at us.

"Well Santana we will take you home first so you can drop off your massive amount of bags and for you to pick up what you need for tonight. Then we can grab a couple of pizzas and maybe grab some movies for tonight? How about we go buy your back to school supplies in the morning, I'm worn out after being in the mall for so long."

We nod our head in agreement to the plan. I call my mom rather than text her so I can give her the pouty pretty please voice while I ask for her permission. Begging through text messaging really doesn't work. My phone call with my mom lasts less than a minute. She told me it would be fine for me to stay the night and there is no need for me to use my "mommy please" voice, as she calls it. I tell her that I will come by to drop off my new school stuff and to pick up my overnight stuff. Brittany squeals when she hears me tell my mom that I'll be by to drop my stuff off, knowing that my mom had said yes to me staying the night.

* * *

><p>Brittany and I climb into the back of her mom's car. Once our seatbelts are buckled our pinkies naturally find themselves linked. I look to Brittany and smile; this is our first official sleepover. Of course we had shared a room during cheer camp but that wasn't really a sleep over. Plus we were always exhausted at the end of the day and had to be up early the next morning so we never got to do the stay up late chit chat that typically accompanies sleepovers.<p>

During the car ride to my house Brittany and I discuss what movies we want to rent and which ones we definitely do not want to see. In the end neither of us had a particular urgency to see any movie. I'm happy that Brittany doesn't really want to watch a movie because I really just want to spend the evening hanging out talking to my best friend. I like just hanging out with Brittany. She makes me laugh and smile the entire time we are together. When we pull into my driveway Brittany turns and faces me.

"S, do you want help carrying your bags inside?"

I can feel my stomach drop at her question. She is being kind and sweet and offering to help me but I'm not ready for her to see what my home life is like. I know that my parents will be sitting at the dinner table right now, and I know my little brother will be sitting in his wheelchair next to the table. I don't want to expose Brittany to my brother like this; I want to explain things to her first. I want to ease her into my brother's situation. I put my walls up, not to keep her out but to make sure she wants to get through them. I want her to want to know everything about me; I don't want to just reveal everything I am without her wanting to know.

"It's okay Britt, I can manage. I'll be back in like five minutes or so, you should keep your mom company."

Her smile falters a little, I know she wants to see what my house looks like, what my room looks like but I'm just not ready. I squeeze her hand as I step out of the car, which causes her smile to return to its naturally carefree state. I remove my bags from the trunk and jog to my front door.

"Santana sweetie, we're in the dining room come show us what you bought today!"

I don't want to keep Brittany and her mom waiting but I also don't want to be ungrateful to my parents. They did pay for everything I purchased today. I walk into the dining room and see my mom and dad sitting at the dining room table eating Chinese food, with my little brother sitting in between them smiling away.

"So is there anything left at the mall?"

My dad jokes with me as I walk into the dining room carrying more bags than I can really manage. I smile at him sheepishly; I really hope he's not worrying about how much I spent.

"Don't worry Dad, there is plenty left. I can go buy it all up if you'd like though."

"I'm good, thanks. So let's see what ya got."

I quickly pull out every item I had purchased today. There is a lot more than I remember buying. My parents smile and make kind comments as I show them my new jeans, shirts, shoes, and other miscellaneous items. Maybe I went a little overboard with how much stuff I bought but every time Brittany said she liked something on me I had to buy it. I hand my parents all of the receipts and wait to be dismissed.

"I don't see any school supplies."

"We kinda wore Brittany's mom out today so she said she would take us to get school supplies tomorrow."

"That's fine, just make sure you get everything on the list that the school sent over. Is there anything else that you need or want that is not on the list?"

"Well I would like a new backpack if that is okay."

"Of course it is okay. Try to keep the cost of all your supplies under two hundred, if possible, but get what you want. And make sure to keep a hold of the receipt. Now go get your stuff together and we will see you tomorrow. Be home by five, if anything comes up and you are going to be late just give us a call, okay?"

"Will do, thanks Dad. Love you!"

Before walking out of the dining room, I give my dad a hug and my mom a kiss on the cheek. It has already been ten minutes since I left Brittany and her mom. I send Brittany a quick text apologizing for taking so long and telling her that I will be out in just a minute. When I reach my room I grab my cheer bag and toss in some pajamas and clothes for tomorrow. I walk into my bathroom and grab everything I need to get ready in the morning and my toothbrush.

I yell goodbye to my parents as I walk out the front door. I sprint to the waiting car, I feel bad for taking so long. From a distance I can see Brittany laughing in the backseat, I love how she laughs. It is like this full body laugh. Every part of her body responds to her laugh; her head tosses back, her smile grows even larger, she claps her hands, as her body shakes. I can see her carefree nature in her laugh. I open the car door and slip in next to Brittany; quickly apologizing for taking so long. Brittany's mom waves off my apology and backs the car out of my drive way. I tell Brittany about having to show my parents everything I bought. She reads the frustration etched on my face, Brittany learned at cheep camp how obsessed I am with being timely.

"Well, at least they didn't make you do a fashion show and try everything on for them. That would be a lot of fun though; we should have a fashion show S."

Brittany is right; it could have been a lot worse. Her way of seeing the world is brilliant. She sees everything through a different colored lens then most people. There is always this sense of optimism laced through her perspective as well as humor. She adds humor to try a lighten situations, to catch people of guard, I'm pretty sure she just loves to make people stop and think about what she just said. I think it is how she keeps people focused on what she is saying. Often people are not really engaged in conversations; they just nod and agree without ever hearing what the other person has to say. Brittany is smart and realizes that people do this, so she intentionally makes humorous, and seemingly non-sense statements, to keep people focused on what she is saying. If Brittany ever throws a random statement out it is because she is trying to lighten the mood or she thinks you're no longer paying attention to her. I like that I know this about Brittany; I like knowing about her unique and insightful little quirks.

* * *

><p>Moments later we are pulling into the video store parking lot. Brittany and I really don't want to watch a movie tonight so we go to the grocery store across the parking lot while Brittany's mom goes into the video store. Apparently she is really committed to the idea of watching a movie tonight. Brittany's mom tells us to meet her back at the car in fifteen minutes. Brittany and I walk into the grocery store and head straight to the junk food aisle.<p>

A sleepover isn't a sleepover without ample amounts of junk food. We carefully scan the aisle trying to decide what to choose. Simultaneously Brittany and I start reaching for different items quickly filling up our small shopping basket. We leave the junk food aisle and head over to the soda aisle. We grab a couple of two liters and walk to the checkout counter. I watch as the cashier scans our items; popcorn, Oreos, Twizzlers, Doritos nacho cheese, gummy bears, M&M's, 7-Up, and Pepsi. I reach for my wallet when the cashier tells us our total, Brittany is too fast for me as she quickly hands the cashier a twenty.

"My sleepover, my treat!"

This is why Brittany is completely perfect. To her life is just what it is. She does not complicate things with details or worries; she just sees how it is and goes about life understanding the situation as it is. I wish I could be like her in this way. I always over analyze things; I worry constantly. I'm afraid of people judging me for one thing or another. I'm afraid of people ridiculing my brother; I want to be like Brittany.

I grab the two bags full of our goodies as we leave the checkout counter. I carry both bags in my right hand and link my left pinkie with Brittany's as we walk towards her mom's car. Her mom has the best timing I have ever witnessed, as soon as we reach the car the trunk pops open and I hear the doors unlock. I look around and see that Brittany's mom is standing in the checkout line at the video store and is gesturing to us "just one minute." I place our bags of goodies into the trunk and the climb into the backseat with Brittany sliding in next to me.

While we wait for Brittany's mom, Brittany takes my hands in hers and has me lay my palms flat against her. Immediately I understand that she wants to play the speed slap game. I feel her tickle my palm with her index finger but I refuse to flinch, if I flinch my turn keeps going I have to make her miss when she goes to slap to win this round. I look from my hands to her eyes; she is staring intently at me. The blue of her eyes completely distract me as she pulls her hand from under mine and gently slaps the top of my right hand. I cannot believe how lost I am. I shake my head and hands trying to refocus on this round. This time I stare at her mouth. She has perfect lips. I watch as her face stays stone while she tickles my palms and then I notice the left side of her mouth tug up just a bit; I whip my hand from the top of her hand just in time to make her miss. Brittany has a pretty decent poker face but I found her tell, she can't help but start to smile when she thinks she's got you just where she wants you.

Brittany's mom opens the driver's side door and slides into the car. "Sorry about the wait girls, the video store was really busy, but I think I picked out some great movies!" She hands the bag of movies back to us. Brittany takes the bag and starts pulling movies out. _Wedding Date_, _Monster-in-Law_, and _Sahara_, apparently comedies are all that the Pierce family watches and Brittany's mom is in the mood for wedding movies. I'm guessing that _Sahara_ is for Brittany's dad. I place the movies back in the bag and place the bag on the front passenger seat as we pull out of the parking lot and head towards Brittany's house.

* * *

><p>As we pull into Brittany's driveway Brittany squeezes my pinkie finger with hers. Her squeeze shows me how excited she is about our sleepover. I have been to Brittany's house a few times over the summer but today feels different. I squeeze her pinkie back; I want her to know that I'm just excited as she is about our sleepover. I grab my cheer bag while Brittany grabs our bags of goodies and we walk into her house. She pulls me in the direction of her bedroom. It seems like as soon as we reach her bedroom her mom is calling us downstairs.<p>

"Girls please come here."

Brittany shrugs and smiles at me gesturing at the door. We walk back downstairs and see her mom sitting on the couch with a phone in one hand and a phone book in the other.

"Where do you guys want pizza from and what toppings do you want?"

"I want pepperoni and black olives, Mom, geez you know what I like on my pizza. I don't care where you get it from as long as it's delicious."

Brittany is so matter of fact with her statements. She turns and smiles at me. I return her smile and then notice that her mom is staring at me as well smiling. Did I miss something, did they ask me a question.

"Santana, do you have any pizza preference, you're eating it as well so I want to make sure we get something you like and that you're not allergic to."

"Oh, sorry. I'm not allergic to any foods. What Britt said works fine for me, actually it sounds really good."

I feel foolish for having blanked out and not answering the question right away, but they don't mind. That's just how the Pierce family is; they are so laid back and considerate. Brittany's mom dismisses us and tells us that she call for us when the pizza arrives; I'm pretty sure the doorbell will cue us in to that though. We turn from the family room and head back upstairs. As I walk behind Brittany I cannot help but notice how her body sways to its own rhythm as she walks. It's like she can her music playing as she walks.

Brittany and I sit on her bedroom floor and give each other pedicures and manicures. We want to look our best when school starts on Monday. I can't help but feel nervous about the idea of school starting. In elementary school there wasn't this pressure to be popular, to be considered cool, all of that changes as soon as I walk through the middle school doors Monday morning. Middle school is all about being one of the popular girls. I have taken every step I can think of to ensure my popularity. I bought trendy clothes, I'm one of the captains of the cheer squad, and I have a perfect best friend that everyone will adore and who I will protect.

I know people will like Brittany; she's too incredible to not like. But I also know that people may make fun of her because she has this uncommon sense of humor. When things are awkward or silent Brittany chimes in and tries to alleviate the tension by making a joke; a joke that usually makes her look dumb. She's not dumb though, she is brilliant. She can make uncomfortable situations completely comfortable. Her perceptive skills are astounding. I just want her to be happy, I want Brittany to be popular and I want her unique personality to be loved. I will do everything I can to protect her from people looking to tear her down. When I look up I notice Brittany staring at me smiling. I know she knows I have been over analyzing things. She has come to know me so well in the short amount of time we have known each other. I shake my head at her and smile, telling her with my gestures that it was nothing. Brittany leaps to her feet when the doorbell rings.

"Come on slow poke let's go get some pizza!"

She grabs my hand and pulls me to my feet. Thankfully I have just finished tightening the lid on the hot pink nail polish I have in my hand. The nail polish bottle falls to the floor as Brittany pulls me to my feet and out of the room. We reach the bottom of the stairs just as Brittany's mom rounds the corner to yell up at us. She jumps back from us startled by our sudden appearance I'm sure. The smell of pizza is wafting through the house; my stomach growls as the scent invades my sense of smell.

"Someone's hungry."

Brittany giggles as she tickles my belly. I can't help but laugh. I slap her hand away and smile sheepishly. She giggles again and leads me into the kitchen. There are three boxes of pizza on the kitchen counter as well as a box of breadsticks. Brittany grabs us each a paper plate and then starts placing pizza and breadsticks on her plate. I follow her lead and grab some pizza and a breadstick. We sit down at the dining room table. Brittany's parents and little sister follow us and sit down. Brittany's little sister is the most adorable three-year old I've ever seen. She has blonde hair, just like the rest of the Pierce family, but her hair has little ringlets at the ends. She looks like a porcelain baby doll.

I wonder if my little brother would look different, if he would look more like me and the rest of my family if it wasn't for his illness. I wonder how his life would be different if he wasn't sick. I bet he would play sports and he would do really well in school. My mom thinks that he and I have similar personality traits, mainly being stubborn, so I bet we would have other similarities. I wish he was healthy so we could play together. So he could go on morning runs with me. I wonder if my mom would let me put him in his wheelchair and take him with me when I go for a run. I bet he would like it.

I look around at the Pierce family. They are laughing and making jokes. Enjoying their pizza and wearing smiles. They are so carefree and happy. Their faces don't reflect lack of sleep or endless worries. I'm sure they have stresses in their lives but their faces don't reveal their secrets. I like being at the Pierce house, I like the feeling of being surrounded by such happiness. I like the light hearted atmosphere that surrounds the family.

"So are you girls excited for school to start on Monday?"

"Oh my gosh Dad, I can't wait for it. Santana and I are going to get matching backpacks tomorrow. Maybe some of our other supplies can match as well. I dunno. But it is going to be so much fun. When mom took us to register last week the school let us pick lockers right next to each other. And they are top lockers, sixth graders usually never get top lockers, but since we are cheerleaders they let us. I guess the cheer coach likes to have all of the cheerleaders' lockers right by her office and since we are captains we get top lockers!"

I'm not even sure if Brittany had taken a breath during that spill to her dad. Apparently she commonly responds to his questions with such enthusiasm because he didn't even blink at her speedy delivery and lack of breathes during it. He turns slightly in his seat and looks in my direction.

"I'm really excited too. This year will introduce us to how classes will be organized in high school. Plus we will start cheerleading on a daily basis instead of a couple of practices a week. And we will actually get to cheer at games and stuff so that will be a lot of fun. I think the best thing about school starting is that I will get to see Brittany every day."

Brittany squealed at my last comment. I blush at her response. Maybe I shouldn't have said that my biggest highlight of school starting is getting to see Brittany every day, but it is the truth. There are a lot of other perks to school starting but Brittany is definitely the biggest. Brittany's parents give each other this knowing smile. I wonder what they are thinking. It is almost like they have this opinion about Brittany and I, it's not a bad opinion just a shared one. I really want to know what their opinion is.

We finish our pizza and head back upstairs. As we walk into Brittany's room she turns and grabs my hand.

"S, do you really mean what you said to my dad?"

"About what Britt?"

"About getting to see me every day is what you are most looking forward to with school starting."

"Of course I meant it Britt, I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it."

Brittany pulls me into a tight hug. I really did mean what I said. I am not the type of person to open up about my feelings so if I ever tell someone how I feel than what I am telling them is definitely how I feel. I hug her back and allow the hug to linger. The hug melts my stress and worries away, I feel loved. It's incredible how much I feel loved by someone who I have only known for a few months.

* * *

><p>I can hear my alarm clock beeping awakening me from my dream. School has been in session for three weeks now. Cheerleading is a lot more work than I thought it was going to be. We have practice every week day at six a.m. I reach over and tap my snooze button; I just need fifteen more minutes of sleep. Waking up at five a.m. is really a challenge for me, I value my sleep. I doze off and think about my plans for the coming weekend. Brittany's birthday is this week and she's having a sleepover. She invited a lot of people over for her birthday party, but I'm the only one who's staying the night. We haven't had a sleepover since the weekend before school started; I'm glad our parents agreed to let us have one for Brittany's birthday. Brittany's mom told her she can have more of her girl friends at the sleepover if she wants, but Brittany insists that I'm the only one she wants to have stay over. I'm glad it will be just Brittany and I, it'll be bad enough putting up with everyone all day at the birthday party.<p>

I really need some time with just my best friend; we get to see each other all the time with school and cheerleading but there are always a lot of other people around. Ever since school started we have spent more time with Quinn. It really is amusing because even though we are sixth graders meaning we should be on the bottom of the food chain, we're not. Brittany, Quinn, and I rule the school already, even the seventh and eighth grade cheerleaders hold us in high regard. Our trinity, as Coach Sylvester calls us, is quiet the powerful force at our middle school. But I'm tired of there always being the three of us; I just need some Brittany time.

My alarm starts to incessantly beep again; I roll over and turn it off. I slowly kick my covers to the side and lower my feet to the floor. I can feel my body stretch reluctantly as I stand from my bed. All I want to do is to just lie back down and sleep for another two hours. Thankfully it is already Wednesday and we don't have cheerleading practice Friday morning because we have a football game that evening to cheer at; the best part about game days is getting to sleep in. After the game the squad is going to a movie together and then I have Brittany's birthday on Saturday, so at least things are looking up this week.

Thirty-five minutes later I am dressed and ready for school. As I finish my breakfast I hear my mom walking down the hallway towards me pushing my brother in his wheelchair. He smiles at me when he sees me. His bus comes early to pick him up for school since the handicap accessible bus always takes a little longer to pick up students. It's nice to see him smile; it's comforting to know he's feeling well.

"Can you get your brother on his bus while I get changed so I can take you to school?"

My mom looks tired today. She's always stressing and worrying about something. She gives so much of herself and never asks for anything in return. I nod at her and stand from the dining room table. She offers me a grateful smile as she turns from the room and walks upstairs. I push my brother's wheelchair outside; it is a cool September morning. The breeze is refreshing yet chilling. I zip up my brother's jacket and place a soft kiss on his cheek. His bus pulls into our circular driveway and the plump assistant steps from the bus.

"Good morning Santana. How's school going?"

She is such a sweet lady. I think you'd have to be a really sweet person to work with special needs children. While it's very rewarding to work with special needs children it's also very demanding, but she always has a smile on her face. She has been the assistant on my brother's bus since he started attending school. For his first few weeks of school the bus driver let me ride with him on the bus to school so he wouldn't be scared, but when the school district found out they told us that I had to ride the bus assigned to my neighborhood and not my brother's bus. Apparently there was some liability issue.

"Morning Claire. School's going well. How is the school year going for you so far?"

"Just fine, thanks for asking."

The ramp lowers to the ground from the bus and I roll my brother's wheelchair onto it. I lock the right tire's brake while Claire locks the left tire's brake and buckles the safety strap. I watch as Claire raises the ramp up to the bus and the other assistant comes and unlocks the brakes and wheels my brother to his designated place on the bus. I give Claire a kind smile and turn to walk back inside. I wonder what school is like in the mind of my brother. I wonder if he understands the process. I wonder why he is even required to attend school, it's not like it will ever make a difference; he won't mentally benefit from school. I guess it gives my mom a break and him as well. It gives him the opportunity to escape his bedroom and experience some aspect of a normal life. I'm thankful he is well enough to attend school; I dread the day when he gets too sick to attend school; when he is too weak to leave his room.

I walk back into the house and wait for my mother to come downstairs. Cheerleading practice starts in twenty minutes but it only takes ten minutes to drive through the town this early in the morning.

* * *

><p>The week goes by rather quickly. At the game on Friday night we had the crowd on their feet cheering along with us. Our coach couldn't stop praising us about how fantastic our routine was, how the music was perfect, and our moves in sync. Quinn, Brittany, and I work well together. Our squad functions well and draws more attention at games than the other squads. I can't help but feel proud about making cheerleading my passion and part of my identity. I part the crowds in the school like Moses parting the Red Sea; shit did I just pull a Coach Sylvester style analogy? Oh well, perhaps when something puts you on the top you can't help but feel divine.<p>

Brittany's birthday party starts in two hours but she asked me to come over a little early to help her decorate. She knows how anal retentive I can be about particular details. Sure I can let my room get messy but when I clean it everything has to be in its perfect place. My abuela is giving me a ride to the party, and my dad said he will pick me up tomorrow morning on his way home from work. Working the graveyard shifts at the hospital are always the worst. One month out of the year my dad works as the emergency room surgical consult and he always gets stuck with the graveyard shifts. It makes things difficult at home because he sleeps during the day and rarely gets to spend time with us. This causes my mom to have to care for my brother entirely on her own, she looks so raged lately. I guess that's why abuela offered to take me to the party. Hopefully, my mom can get a nap in today.

"Sannie, are you ready to go sweetie?"

"Yeah, abuela, let me grab my bag."

The ride to Brittany's house is relatively quiet. My abuela asks how school is going, she asks about cheerleading, and then she asks if I have a boyfriend. I haven't really given much time to considering a boyfriend. I know there are guys that are interested in me but I have to be very careful about dating anyone. I mean I'm only in the sixth grade, do people even date that young. I simply tell my abuela that I don't have a boyfriend but that I did kiss this boy Marcus at the end of last school year. She gives me an odd smile and remains silent for the rest of the drive. Maybe I shouldn't have told her about kissing Marcus, is she disappointed in me, will she tell my dad? Fear washes over me as I worry that I may have disappointed one of the most important people in my life. When we arrive at Brittany's house my abuela turns in her seat and looks at me.

"Sannie, you need to make sure you are careful about how close you are with your girl friends, you don't want the boys at your school or other people to get the wrong impression about you, okay?"

"Abuela, I'm always careful when it comes to the impressions I make on people."

She nods at me and says goodbye. I open her car door and then grab my cheer bag from the back seat. I wave at her as she drives away. I really don't understand what she meant by that comment. What kind of impression are people going to start making about me because I have close girl friends, or rather one close girl friend. I shake the comment and resulting thoughts from my mind; today is about Brittany and I don't want what my abuela said to ruin this day.

* * *

><p>Before I reach the door Brittany has swung it open and is running towards me. I can't help but let a huge smile to spread across my face. Brittany leaps into me and gives me a hug. I hug her back and as we hug I can't help but take a deep breath. Her scent invades my senses and I feel my heart flutter. Brittany is my best friend and she makes me happier than anyone else in this world.<p>

Brittany links her pinkie with mine and pulls me towards the house. When we get inside I immediately walk up to her bedroom and place my cheer bag on the right side of her bed, I always sleep on the right side of the bed. It works perfectly for Brittany and me because she likes to sleep on the left side of the bed. I unzip my bag and pull the small wrapped present from my bag and slip it under my pillow, this present is just from Brittany to see and open, I don't want her to open it in front of anyone but me. Then I pull the second gift from my bag and head back downstairs.

I place my gift on the dining room table which has been designated as the gift table. Also on the table is Brittany's birthday cake. Her mom had the cake decorated with a cheerleading theme. I think Brittany's mom loves the idea of Brittany being a cheerleader more than Brittany; it's adorable how much Brittany's mom loves cheerleading. She has come to every game we have cheered at this season and has cheered us on; it's kinda weird for cheerleaders to have someone in the crowd cheering for them, but I like it.

Brittany and I spend the next hour and a half or so decorating the living room and dining room. We hang rainbow stringers everywhere. There are multicolored balloons tied to the backs of the dining table chairs and randomly dispersed in the living room. I try to keep things symmetrical but Brittany wants things to look different.

"What's the fun if everything looks the same S?"

"Sorry Britt, I can't help the impulse sometimes."

"Don't worry S, I'll get you to relax later."

Brittany bounces on the back of her heels and turns around after giving me this devilish smirk. Minutes later the doorbell rings out, the first of Brittany's guests has arrived. For the next little while everyone causally chats while people continue to arrive. After the last of the invited guests have arrived Brittany has everyone gather in the living room. We play a few party games and eat pizza. Pizza always seems to be a staple food of birthday parties and I'm pretty sure the Pierce phone has a few of the local pizza places on speed dial. Once we finish the pizza and stop playing the games we gather in the dining room and sing happy birthday to Brittany as she blows the candles out on her birthday cake.

After cake and ice cream and the opening of all of the presents people start to leave. Eventually just the girls on the sixth grade cheer squad remain. Brittany wanted them to feel special so she had invited them to stay a little longer than the rest. Brittany's parents leave us in the living room and start cleaning up the mess from today. Suddenly the casual conversations we are having takes an unexpected turn.

"Let's play truth or dare!" Quinn whispers to the group, I suppose she whispers because she doesn't want Brittany's parents to hear her.

All the girls excitedly agree to this idiotic idea. I'm not much of a fan of these types of games. People just use these games to get other people to do what they want them to do; I really don't want to play. But when Brittany looks up at me with those big blue eyes, pleading me to play, I can't tell her no. I sit next to Brittany in the circle of girls. The dares are foolish and ridiculous, thankfully nothing is too embarrassing. The game has been going for about ten minutes and it is Brittany's turn again, she has already had two turns and each time she had picked dare.

"Truth"

"Have you ever kissed a boy?" Quinn asks Brittany with a knowing smirk on her face.

"No. I've never been kissed." Brittany blushes as she responds to the question.

Everyone starts laughing at Brittany and telling her how she has to be kissed or she can't be popular; that you're only popular if you're desired. I hate how mean they're being to her.

"Whatever, this game is so stupid! Let's just watch a movie or something." I deflect the attention away from Brittany.

The girls gawk at me as I stand from the circle and put a movie in. I intentionally pick something ridiculous because I know the other girls won't want to watch it so they will all just go home instead, they don't deserve to be here after treating Brittany this way. My plan works and within twenty minutes Brittany and I are the only ones that remain. We take down the streamers that are strewn across the living room and return all of the decorative pillows to their proper locations. Once the living room is clean I help Brittany carry all of her presents up to her room. She received a lot of CDs, some clothes, a few cheer themed hair ties, and a journal. I gave her the journal. I had her name embossed on the cover of the journal. For me writing down my thoughts and worries have always helped me alleviate my stress, Brittany doesn't seem stressed but I'm sure she would like something to write her feelings down in.

* * *

><p>When we reach Brittany's room and empty our arms of all of the presents Brittany and I get ready for bed. I know we won't be going to sleep anytime soon but I also know that we will likely fall asleep in the middle of our conversation so it is best to get ready for bed early. I watch Brittany in the mirror as we brush our teeth; she's upset. It's very rare that Brittany lets someone get to her.<p>

"Britt-Britt, what's wrong?"

I put down my toothbrush, wipe my mouth, and turn to face my best friend. She puts down her toothbrush as tears fill her eyes. Her tears cause her eyes to turn this deep blue color, the color of a lake at its deepest points. My heart sinks as I see the tears streak down my best friend's face. I reach out and grab a hold of her and pull her into me. I stand there hugging her as she cries into my shoulder.

"I just want them to like me, I want to know that I have friends and I don't understand why kissing is so important. I don't like any of the boys at school and certainly not enough to kiss. Really I only like one person enough to kiss."

Brittany slaps her hand to mouth after she says this. I'm pretty sure she didn't mean to say that last comment out loud. I have a pretty good idea that I'm the only person she likes enough to kiss. I understand what she means; we are best friends and have had an instant connection. We are very close to each other, why wouldn't she want to experience her first kiss with someone she felt so close to. I only wish I had saved my first kiss for someone I actually liked; that I had not given into the pressures of wanting to be popular.

I reach up and pull Brittany's hand from her mouth. I'm glad she shared so openly with me and I want her to know that she is safe to share her thoughts with me. We are best friends, we need to support each other and help each other. I keep a hold of Brittany's wrist and pull her closer to me. Before I completely understand what I am about to do, I'm doing it.

I take my other hand and brace it on the back of Brittany's neck and pull her face towards me. I gently press our lips together. Her lips are soft and silky. Our lips mold perfectly together and slide against each other effortlessly. I feel my heart begin to race and my stomach turn. Kissing Marcus didn't feel like this, nothing in my life had ever felt like this. I can feel goose bumps spreading up and down my arms. Suddenly what my abulea had told me flashes through my mind and I pull away from Brittany. I smile at her and walk out of the bathroom and back into her bedroom. I need space from her if just for a few seconds.

I realize now what my abuela had meant when she told me to be careful with how close I am with my girl friends because I don't want people to get the wrong impression. I definitely don't want people to think that Brittany is anything more than my best friend. We're only best friends that's it; no matter how my heart or stomach responds, Brittany and I will always only be best friends.

Brittany walks into her bedroom a few minutes later. I'm sure she delayed returning to her room; knowing that I probably needed a few minutes of alone time. She knows me all too well. I smile at her when she walks into the room. I really don't want to talk about what just happened so I reach under my pillow and hand her the small gift I had hidden there.

"This is something I wanted to give you but it's just for you I didn't want the others to see me give it to you."

Brittany gives me this curious look and slowly begins to open the small package. She removes the lid from the box and lifts the small charm bracelet. There is only a single charm on the bracelet, a heart. On the heart is engraved the letter B. Brittany has such a special heart; she is so kind and gentle. I felt like giving her a heart shaped charm is the perfect way of showing her that the thing I like most about her is her heart.

"S, this is beautiful! Thank you so much! Will you put it on me?"

I take the bracelet from Brittany's hand and unfasten it. She stretches out her left arm and I fasten the bracelet around her left wrist. She lifts up her wrist and examines how the charm dangles from her wrist. I can't help but smile at how transfixed she is on the single dangling charm. Brittany gives me a soft hug, I feel the butterflies start to stir and quickly pull from the hug. I grab Brittany's hand and pull her towards her bed. I have her sit down next to me. I have to stop the affection between us because it is confusing my mind. I say the only thing I can think of.

"Brittany there's something I want to tell you."

* * *

><p>I trust Brittany, I really do. I trust her more than I have ever trusted another person in my entire life. I know that I can tell Brittany anything and she won't judge me or think differently of me. I know that if I tell her about my brother she will be kind, supportive, and loving. I take a deep breath and look into her deep blue eyes. I'm so guarded that it is difficult to begin, it is so hard to let my walls down, to let someone in.<p>

"Santana, what's wrong? You know you can tell me anything! You're my best friend."

Tears burn for escape; my hands are shaking with nervousness. I've never told any of my friends about my brother, but then again none of my friends have ever been like Brittany. I wipe at the tears lingering in my eyes and begin to tell Brittany everything. She sits quietly and never interrupts as I begin to tell her everything there is to know about my little brother.

I tell her that he was diagnosed with cerebral palsy shortly after he was born. That he underwent his first surgery when he was only two months old. That for the first year or so of his life he had to wear this harness brace thing to help position his hips. That he is now seven years old and cannot walk, or talk, or feed himself and only weighs about thirty-five pounds. I tell her how he tries to communicate with us, how he has special noises that mean different things. How he has learned some sign language; he knows how to sign food, drink, and more. I tell her about how he is always getting sick and how I am terrified of losing him. My body begins to shake as I sob. Saying all of this out loud is a lot harder than I ever thought it would be. But in the same light I feel this sense of relief, of calm. Brittany pulls my head into her chest as I cry, she cradles me and I feel so comforted. I know I have made the right decision to tell her about him. My sobbing subsidies and I remain laying against Brittany in silence.

"What's your brother's name?"

Such a simple question, a detail I never revealed. Brittany doesn't ask about his medical problems, his mental or physical deficiencies, she only wants to know his name.

"Manuel Santos Lopez, but we usually just call him Mannie."

"I like that name, I like the nickname even more!"

I can't help but laugh at the face Brittany is making. It's like she is really turning the name over in her mind. Like she is taking all of the information I have just given her and created a visual image of my brother in her mind. Brittany, like Mannie, has managed to capture a special place in my heart. I place where I become unguarded and vulnerable; and in this moment I feel completely safe and comfortable with Brittany having this place.

"Thanks for telling me about your brother S. I'd like to meet him one day, when you're ready of course."

"You will Britt, I promise. I trust you!"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Notes:<strong>

Thank you for your comments. I'd love to know what you think! I know I have rated this story M and it will eventually have M content but it won't be for awhile. I hope to have weekly updates now that school is out!

Also I am still looking to bring a Beta on board so if you're interested please let me know!


	3. Chapter 3: I Want You to Meet Him

Chapter 3 – I Want You To Meet Him April 2006

* * *

><p>My sixth grade year has gone by fast. Having my friendship with Brittany has made everything in life easier. I never thought school could be this easy. There is only a month and a half of school left. It feels like only yesterday that Brittany and I were registering for school; now summer is approaching and I wonder how its arrival will change the friendship that has blossomed between us. We've already made plans for our summer. Of course we'll be attending cheer camp again, except this year we'll be attending as reigning captains and admired cheerleaders.<p>

Our cheer coach didn't make Quinn, Brittany, or I re-tryout for the cheer team. Everyone else on the team had to tryout again and some people didn't make the seventh grade squad. I'm not sure if it was the best of ideas to have the try-outs for next year's squad prior to our final competition of the year but that's the coach's decision not ours. However, she did tell those who are currently on the team but not selected for next year's team that they still had a chance if they performed well in the final competition. It's this big regional competition. We don't have Nationals or even State competitions at the sixth grade level so the cheer association created this huge regional competition. There are over fifty cheer squads competing in it. The competition is this upcoming weekend and I'm excited yet incredibly nervous about it. I mean if the coach is willing to reconsider putting people on the team for next year based off of the outcome of the competition, she may also reconsider those who made the team for next year. I don't know what I would do if I had cheerleading taken from me; it is the next best thing to Brittany in my life, or in escaping my life.

All season we have been outperforming other cheer squads at our local competitions so the expectations are high. I know that performing well in this competition will help boost my reputation at the school. A month ago I requested the coach to add an extra hour to our morning and after school practices. While I'm exhausted ninety-nine percent of the time by the end of the day it is nice to have this distraction from my life at home. Two additional hours away from the stress is like a blessing in disguise. Brittany, Quinn, and I have been working on an amazing routine for the competition and Brittany has choreographed the most incredible dance numbers for another part of the competition. As long as we can pull off these moves we are a sure win in the cheer and dance portions of the competition.

Brittany's talent for choreograph is inspiring. I've never seen anyone dive so far into their passion. No matter what obstacles she has been faced with she has managed to overcome. Not only are these numbers spectacular to watch; Brittany was also able to create moves that highlight each girl's skill set while at the same time hiding their inabilities. Like Sarah's parts in the numbers highlight her flexibility and limberness and hide the fact that the girl cannot tumble to save her life. I can't wait to perform these numbers. Our dance competition is on Friday and the cheer competition is Saturday.

I've already asked Brittany to stay the night Saturday after the competition. We will probably all go out to dinner as a team, especially if we win, but after that it will be just Brittany and I at my house. This is the first time Brittany will be at my house and I'm so nervous. Even though I've told her about Mannie and his health problems it's a whole other step to actually introduce her to my parents and little brother. I mean she's met my mom and dad since they have picked us up from school and dropped me off at Brittany's house, but Brittany will be meeting them for the first time in my home. She'll see a glimpse of what my home life is like, a glimpse of the type of stress and worries that my home life entails. I'm nervous for her to see this more fragile side of who I am. It'll be okay though. I'm sure by the time we get to my place on Saturday we'll be so exhausted we'll just go straight to bed so I won't have to deal with everything until Sunday morning. It'll be okay, I know it'll be okay.

* * *

><p>We're standing outside the middle school waiting for the bus to arrive to take us to our cheer competition. Even though it is late April it is freezing cold outside. Of course it is only five thirty in the morning. The competition is being hosted two hours away and begins at nine so we have to leave early. Coach wants us to be early to the competition so we can stake out an area at the hosting school to hangout in between our performances.<p>

All of the dance competitions are begin held on Friday. As a team we are entered in the "any style," "modern," and "hip hop" competitions and Brittany and Tony are entered in a dance duet competition. The individual competitions are held last, which makes me happy because that means I can watch Brittany and Tony perform without having to worry about getting the team ready for our team competitions. We then have our cheer competition as a team on Saturday. I also have a "power tumbler" and "group stunt" competition on Saturday. My "power tumbler" is an individual event and for the group stunt Brittany, Quinn, Marcus, and I are performing. I'm partnered with Marcus for a majority of the stunts since I'm the smallest and the best flyer on the team. Our group stunt is the last competition on Saturday and I'm pretty sure I'll be exhausted by the end of the day. Quinn and Stephanie are also performing in the "power tumbler" competition. Brittany was going to but with all of the dancing she'll be doing on Friday plus the group stunt event and the cheer portion, Coach didn't want to wear her out. It'll be a lot of fun though and it'll be nice to have Brittany in the audience cheering me on while I perform in the "power tumbler" event.

My parents can't make it to either day of the competitions because Mannie has some appointments on Friday and will be getting shots which will make him super crabby on Saturday. Plus my dad has to work on Saturday so my mom can't come and leave Mannie with him. It is really hard to never feel like a priority in my parent's lives. I know they love me and support my activities but it'd be nice to see them there cheering and not just footing the bill. I'm incredibly grateful that they allow me to participate in my extracurricular activities and never complain about the costs, but I just wish it felt like they actually cared about what I'm doing. I wish they could see me perform; see how much I love my sport. I'm lost in my thoughts until I feel a soft finger link around my pinkie. I turn and smile when I see Brittany standing next to me. She must have just arrived; I offered to pick her up this morning but she said that her mom wanted to drop her off so she could talk to the coach about something. I turn and see Brittany's mom having an excitedly animated discussion with our coach.

"What's that about Britt?" I ask with a head nod in the direction of Brittany's mom.

"Oh my gosh! Mom wants to chaperone the trip. She found out last night, from Quinn's mom, that Stephanie's mom canceled on being a chaperone so now she wants to fill in. She even packed a bag hoping Coach would say it's ok. She's obsessed with cheerleading." Brittany rolls her eyes while she tells me the story. I can't help but smile at the bit of annoyance that creeps its way onto Brittany's face. I know Brittany loves her mom and cheerleading but I also know how frustrated Brittany can get when her mom seems to care more about cheerleading than Brittany.

The next thing I know Brittany's mom is running over to us with excitement written all over her face. I know in an instant Coach has told her she'd love to have her help chaperone the trip. I can also tell Brittany has come to the same conclusion when she lets out a frustrated sigh and places an "I'm annoyed beyond comprehension" smirk on her face.

"Oh girls! I get to join you this weekend; this is going to be such a fun trip!" Even though I know Brittany is upset about her mom chaperoning the trip; I can't help but feel a little jealous that her mom will be with us the entire time while my mom can't even escape for a few hours to see me perform. At least there will be a video made of our performances that I can show her when we get home.

This kid in the middle school AV Club is kind of obsessed with all of us and begged Coach to let him video tape our performance. He is doing everything, the editing, filming, and burning everyone a copy, for free so Coach told him he could join us on the trip. The guys on the team are annoyed at the idea of having to share a hotel room with the kid tonight and the girls are annoyed by his mere presence. He's so creepy.

Brittany's mom stands behind us and wraps her arms around our shoulders, embracing us like we are her pride and joy at this moment. Well, I know Brittany is but I even feel like I'm really important to her in that solitary moment. I lean back into her embrace and enjoy that moment of comfort. As I turn to face Brittany I see the bus pull into the parking lot.

This is not the normal school bus that we have become accustomed to taking to games and local competitions. Nor is it a death trap of a bus like the one we rode to cheer camp. It is a deluxe travel bus. Everyone's mouths drop in surprise. We had no idea we were getting such a nice bus.

"Listen up team! You have performed exceptionally well this year and I want to see us have continued success this weekend so I am rewarding you with this bus. I want all of you to get some rest while we drive. Absolutely no talking, I want to see all eyes closed and only hear the peaceful sound of my squad snoring away. When there are twenty minutes left in the ride I and the other chaperones will let you know and quiet time will be over. Now, load up!"

Brittany's mom hands us each a pillow and then a blanket to share and ushers us to get on the bus, taking our cheer bags from us. Thankfully we already had pulled our iPods out. Brittany and I take the last seat on the bus; it's kind of become our tradition to sit in the back. Brittany sits next to the window and I take the seat by the aisle. She rests her pillow up against the window puts her headphones in and leans into her pillow. Then she takes my pillow and places it against her shoulder and motions for me to lie against her. She is taking this no talking rule seriously. I mouth a thank you to her, place my headphones into my ears, and lean against her shoulder. Before the bus even starts moving I can feel myself drifting off to sleep.

* * *

><p>We must've left our school late or stopped along the way because we don't arrive at the school where the competition is being hosted until after eight. Coach is frantically yelling orders at us. She demands that Quinn, Brittany, and I follow her to the check-in table to help make sure we're checked-in to all of the events we're registered for. Thankfully Brittany's mom takes our bags and Quinn's mom takes her bag so we can rush of with Coach. Coach tells everyone else to change, freshen up, and find a spot in the school for the team to gather in between competitions. Brittany's and Quinn's moms take the rest of the team in the opposite direction.<p>

Only eight other teams arrive before us so the line at the check-in table really isn't too long. Brittany and I stand in line for the dance check-in and Quinn and Coach stand in line for the cheer check-in. We double check that we're registered for the correct dance competitions and that Brittany and Tony are registered for the dance duet competition. We hand in duplicates of all liability waivers, Coach already mailed the originals in months ago, and then verify they have our team marked as paid for all registration costs. Once we've checked in the ladies working the tables hand us a package of information with schedules for each team member and chaperone.

Check-in only takes a few minutes and in no time we are making our way towards the team. Our first event is the "Any Style" dance. We are the third team to perform. When we reach the rest of the team Coach orders us to go get changed into our outfits for the competition. Today there will be a lot of changing since we have a different outfit for each routine. I'm actually really excited about this competition though. Unlike all of our other competitions, we were given a lot of freedom to be creative with our routines and costumes for this competition. Brittany created three perfectly choreographed team dance routines. Our "Any Style" routine infuses Hip Hop and Ballet with some tumbling. It's truly incredible what she has done. There are all kinds of lifts and some Swing moves that took forever to perfect.

We watch in the wings as the first two teams perform. The first team is so nervous that they their routine falls apart. Their rhythm becomes out of sync with the music and no one is in time. It makes me a little nervous to see this team crumble. The second team performs their routine almost flawlessly. There are a few bobbles here and there but those will only amount to a few minor point deductions. However, the difficulty of their routine is very low. It won't take a lot to beat them because their number did not contain any risky stunts. As the music softens my palms begin to sweat. Our squad is up next and our number is very difficult.

Once the other team exits the stage, our team proceeds to take our places. We have danced this routine a thousand times before. The lights on the stage are dimmed, as the music begins to play the lights brighten. First, the lights show Brittany and Tony and then Quinn and Anthony and finally Marcus and me. We begin the Swing portion of the dance and as we start our third move the lights raise the rest of the way and the remainder of the team begins to dance. I can no longer hear the music; I only hear the roar of the crowd. The crowd loves the dance number. People are on their feet cheering and applauding. Excitement soars in my chest as I move from one step to the next. Brittany is a choreographing genius! After what seemed like mere seconds the dance ends and we hurry off stage. Coach is there waiting. She congratulates us on a perfect routine and reminds us that there is a lot more competition to go and to not get overly confident. We all nod in understanding and she shuffles us off to get changed and ready for the next dance, which isn't for another two hours.

* * *

><p>While we change and mentally prepare for our next routine, Brittany's and Quinn's moms leave the school to pick up some food and drinks for the team. Apparently no one ate before leaving this morning and the only drinks we brought with us are our cheer water bottles. Brittany walks everyone through the Modern number we will be performing next. The number is the slowest routine we have to perform. The movements are beautiful. I wonder what Brittany envisioned as she choreographed this number.<p>

An hour and a half before we are to perform our Modern number Brittany's and Quinn's moms return with our food. They couldn't have arrived at a more perfect time. We had just finished our run through of the number and everyone is in the "time to get your head in the game" mood. The team quietly grabs some food. Everyone has headphones in, not talking to anyone. Brittany, Quinn, and I all grab a bottle of water, a yogurt, and some freshly cut up fruit. We sit in silence eating. Brittany leans back against a wall and closes her eyes. Some may think she's napping but I know she is running through the routine over and over again in her mind. I know the song playing in her ears is the song we will be performing to. Some may think that Brittany is scattered brained and not a serious person, but I know when it comes to her dancing it is her passion. When it comes to dance she is the most focused person you'll ever meet.

In no time we are standing off-stage waiting for the team performing to finish up so we can take the stage. For this performance we are the third to last to perform. I feel the nervous anticipation surge through my body once again, but I know that this performance will be the easiest of the weekend. While the steps are not simple they are a lot less complex than the steps in our other routines. There are a few lifts and an aerial stunt but nothing too challenging. As the other team rushes past us I take a deep breath and walk towards my place on stage.

I hear the music begin to play and I feel Marcus's hand clasp around mine. Marcus is a nice guy and we are always paired up as partners. His grasp tightens around my hand as he spins me away from him and then pulls me back towards him ending the move with a dip. The long eloquent movements of our dance takes hold as the team moves in unison across the stage. There are no cheers or hollering from the crowd. They are speechless as the watch our dance. The music fades out and the lights dim as we make our final step. The dance ends with we wrapped up in Marcus's arms, it feels weird to be this close to him. I take a breath and pull my body away from his. He smiles awkwardly at me; I take a further step away trying to clear my head. Just then I feel Brittany's pinkie wrap around mine and it's like a million pounds of pressure has been lifted from my shoulders. I turn to face her.

"You did great S! You're moves were perfect, come on let's get something to drink before our next routine."

I nod and follow her off stage. Unlike our last performance where we had a two hour break, this time we only have forty-five minutes before we have to be back on stage for our Hip-Hop number. Our Hip-Hop routine is by far my favorite dance routine.

* * *

><p>We quickly change our outfits and return to our meeting space. Brittany walks us through the choreography of the Hip-Hop routine. Besides our cheer routine, this is the routine we have practiced the most, which is a good thing since Brittany is rushing through the steps. She spent so much time choreographing this routine and she has some crazy maneuvers to perform. She does all sorts of flips and her famous no-handed cartwheel. I can't wait to perform this number. There are a lot of extremely difficult moves but as a team we have practiced this number flawlessly for weeks now.<p>

It feels like only minutes ago we were exiting the stage after performing our Modern dance routine. As we walk onto the stage I know this will be one of the most difficult, if not the most difficult, Hip-Hop routine performed. Brittany has incorporated stepping, isolations, and acrobatics into our routine. The transitions are seamless so long as we complete every move and step perfectly. One wrong step and the routine will be ruined. There is no room for error with this routine.

The music is blaring and the crowd is going wild. Every move is executed with absolute perfection. No one misses a step and our isolations are so in sync it actually surprises me. I never thought the routine would go so well. It was beyond perfection; Brittany's choreographing is beyond perfect; she's beyond perfect. The music dies down and we exit the stage. The excitement and energy of the team is through the roof. I lock eyes with Brittany as she wipes her brow and offers a soft smile.

As she walks away I can tell she is exhausted. She has worked so had choreographing these routines and has had the most difficult moves in all of them. I rush past the rest of the team in order to catch up with Brittany. When I reach her I gently squeeze her arm.

"B, what's wrong? Did something go wrong in the performance that I didn't notice?"

"Oh, no San. I'm just tired and Tony and I still have our duet. I just wish I could rest."

She smiles and I can see the exhaustion written all over her face. Her outfit for the duet is the same as the ones we wore for the Hip-Hop routine, which means she doesn't have to worry about changing. Since she has an hour and a half before her duet, I wrap my pinkie around hers and pull her down an isolated corridor.

"Here B, sit down and rest your head in my lap. I'll watch the time and you can take a little power nap. Sleep for like twenty minutes and you'll feel like a hundred times better."

"Thanks San, you really are the best."

Brittany lays her head in my lap and within minutes I can feel her body relax as she drifts off. As she sleeps I run my fingers through her ponytail appreciating how soft her hair feels sliding through my fingers. I feel completely whole with her this close to me. It feels amazing to be able to comfort and support her. Twenty minutes passes by rather quickly and I feel bad about having to wake Brittany because she looks so peaceful. I bend over and softly press a kiss to her temple.

"BrittBritt, you need to wake up."

Brittany rolls over and her eyes slowly start to flutter open.

"Mmm, you're right San, I feel tons better now!"

* * *

><p>Brittany and Tony spend the next hour practicing their duet. They both know the steps backwards and forwards. I just know they are going to win this competition. The team and I all take seats in the auditorium and wait for Brittany and Tony to perform. The duets before them are good; you can tell each team made their best dancers before in the duet competition. When I see Brittany take the stage my heart leaps into my throat. I've never felt nervous for someone else. I want to see Brittany succeed; she has worked so hard on these routines, she deserves to win.<p>

The lights in the auditorium dim and the spotlight burns bright on Brittany. She's poised and elegant as she dances across the stage towards Tony. As I watch her approach him I can't help but feel a surge of jealously course through me. I want to be the one dancing with her, performing with her. Their dance is beautiful; breathtaking even. As the music ends I leap to my feet and applaud until my hands hurt. When Brittany exits the stage I turn in my seat and I see Brittany's mom crying. I reach out and grasp her arm.

"She was amazing!"

"I never realized how incredibly talented my daughter is and how graceful her dancing is. She was born to do this."

I smile shyly at her and turn my attention back to the stage. More than anything I want to leave my seat and find Brittany but I know that walking out when another duet is about to perform would be rude. I return to my seat but my attention is somewhere else. It is lost in the vision of Brittany dancing across that stage. Dancing perfectly; performing a dance that brought her mother to tears. As I'm lost in my thoughts I feel a soft tap on my shoulder.

"Hey, can I sit next to you?"

I love the sound of her voice. So soft and kind; just hearing her voice brings a warming calm over me.

"Of course!"

Brittany sits next to me and links her pinkie around mine. We sit like that for the rest of the performances. I can't help but lean my head against her shoulder as the final performers take the stage. Today has been long and exhausting. I can't wait to get to the hotel and sleep.

* * *

><p>Quinn, Stephanie, Brittany, and I are sharing a hotel room. When we reach our room Quinn and Stephanie toss their bags on the same bed, leaving the other bed for Brittany and I. Quinn tells us she is going to go visit with her mom for a little while. Stephanie follows after Quinn; we should really call her mini Quinn. Brittany grabs her pajamas and heads to the bathroom, seconds later I hear the shower start. I'm surprised that she is only taking a shower; she should take a bath to help alleviate her aching muscles and relieve her stress. The sound of the running water ceases ten minutes later. Brittany walks back into the room and slips into bed.<p>

"You danced beautifully today Britt Britt! You're an incredible dancer."

"Thanks San. You were amazing today to, will you cuddle with me."

I snuggle up to Brittany and feel her relax into me. In a matter of minutes I hear her breathes soften and her body completely relax as she silently slips into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

><p>I'm woken abruptly by the sound of our ringing hotel phone. Our wakeup call has come too soon; I wince as I reach for the phone. My muscles are stiff and sore from yesterday. I feel Brittany snuggle closer to me. I look across the room and watch as Quinn rubs the sleep from her eyes. She jabs Stephanie in the ribs to wake her. Not the nicest way to wake someone up. I rotate in Brittany's arms and stroke my finger over her nose.<p>

"Hey Britt Britt, it's time to get up."

"mmm, I don't wanna get up. Can't we just sleep another ten minutes please."

"Quinn, are you going to shower?"

I need to shower but I can shower last, which will give Britt and I a little more cuddle time. I roll back over to look at Quinn waiting for her response.

"Um, yeah. Stephanie and I both need to shower this morning."

"Well, then you need to hurry up and get in the shower because I need to shower as well. You two go first and I'll go last."

"Stephanie can use this shower I'll just go use the one in my mom's room."

Quinn and Stephanie stumble from their bed and gather their shower essentials. I roll back over and cuddle back into Brittany, happy to have gained a little extra sleep time. Brittany snuggles in closer and wraps her arms around my waist. I quickly drift back to sleep in the warmth of her embrace. It feels like only seconds later when I hear the bathroom door open and Stephanie loudly pronounce that the shower is all mine. Begrudgingly I pull myself from the warmth of Brittany's body and toss the blankets to the side. As I roll out of the bed the coolness of the room sends chills rippling through my body. I hurry to the bathroom and jump into the shower finding relief in the warmth of the water.

* * *

><p>We arrive at the school shortly before nine am and find our way to the spot we used yesterday. Teams are slowly trickling in and all look a little weary. Yesterday was a long day for most teams and today we have to have just as much energy and even more concentration as we perform our cheer routines. While yesterday's dance routines had some risky stunts they are nothing compared to what we are doing today. First up is our team cheer competition. We have to compete in an hour. Once everyone has placed down their cheer bags and other random possessions Coach has us follow her outside so we can do a few walkthroughs of our routine.<p>

We walk through the steps and lifts and practice our yell a few times before Coach ushers us back inside. We spend the twenty minutes prior to having to report to the stage listening to music and getting amped up. I sit next to Brittany with my headphones on and music blaring. I can hear nothing but the thumping rhythm of my own music. My anxiety builds as our time to perform approaches. We've spent so much time perfecting and practicing this routine. It is flawless but so incredibly difficult.

It feels like only a few minutes have passed but here I am standing on the stage waiting for our music to begin. With the first thump of music a large smile plasters across my face and then I'm tossed into the air. As twist my body and then land in Marcus's arms with a thump. He tosses me so high it hurts to land in his arms like this, but I don't have time to wince. We move from basket tosses to pyramids and then into our yell. The transitions are in time and every stunt is performed in sync and cleanly. Minutes later our music stops and we shuffle off the stage.

* * *

><p>The Power Tumbler event is not for a hours, which is amazing because I need to eat something. When we returned to the hotel last night we were too tired to even join the team for dinner. Brittany and I went straight to sleep after her shower, and then, because of our cuddle session this morning and my nerves, we didn't eat breakfast. While I'm starving I don't want to eat too much because I still have two events and my nerves are making me pretty queasy.<p>

When we arrive at our team meeting spot Brittany's mom is standing there with fresh fruit and muffins for Brittany and I. I have never been so grateful to see her mom before. She is such an incredible person. I know Brittany feels like her mom cares more about the cheerleading part of this weekend then the Brittany part but I know that's not true. She clearly cares about Brittany.

"I figured you girls hadn't eaten so I thought I'd get you something to eat before your next event."

"Thanks Mom!"

Brittany takes the food from her mom, hands it to me, and then gives her mom a huge bear hug. Maybe Brittany is starting to realize this isn't all about cheerleading; it's about her and their shared passion for the sport.

"Thanks Mrs. Pierce."

"Santana for the last time it's Cheryl, no more of this Mrs. Pierce nonsense, okay?"

"Okay."

My family can be super strict about calling people by respectful and proper names so it feels awkward to agree to call Brittany's mom by her first name but if she asked me to, it would be rude not to. Brittany and I sit down on the floor next to our cheer bags and eat our breakfast. Thankfully today there are no outfit changes, as long as we keep our uniforms clean.

Once we finish our food I put my headphones in and lay my head in Brittany's lap. She doesn't have to compete again until our group stunt. I stretch my legs out and drift into a peaceful state. I feel Brittany run her fingers through my hair playing with the strands. Her gentle motions cause a chill to shoot through my spine and the hairs on the back of my neck to stand on end.

* * *

><p>It feels like I'd only been resting in Brittany's lap a short time when Quinn comes up to me and tells me it's time to perform. Stephanie performs first, then me, and then Quinn. We are the last power tumbler performances. Quinn and I wait on the side of the stage while Stephanie performs. The rest of the team is sitting in the audience. Stephanie has a couple bobbles and under rotates one of her flips but for the most part she had a pretty good performance.<p>

My heart races as I walk out onto the stage. This is the first time I've come out here all alone. I feel my palms sweat. I search the audience and lock eyes with Brittany. I watch her waiting for my music to queue up. As I stare I can see her mouth "I believe in you. You can do this." My chest heaves with reassurance. I can't explain why it matters to me so much that she believes in me, but it does.

I smile at Brittany and the music begins to play. I complete my first pass with perfection, this bolsters my confidence and in that moment I know I can do this. The rest of my performance is flawless. Every landing is clean, every rotation completed, each move crisp. I could not be prouder of myself. When my music ends I rush off stage and wish Quinn a brief good luck. I would stay and watch her but I need air, I did this, on my own. No, not on my own, I did this with Brittany's support; her belief in me is all I needed to succeed.

When I exit the stage doors there's Brittany standing there waiting. She jumps at me and wraps her arms tightly around me. I think her smile might be even bigger than mine.

"San, you were so amazing. You definitely won that! Even if Quinn is perfect you had a higher difficulty and you did it perfectly."

"Thanks B."

I feel the heat rise in my face at Brittany's compliment. I don't know what I did to deserve her kindness, her confidence, her friendship. I'm so lucky to have her as my best friend.

"Brittany, thanks for being my best friend. I just want you to know that you mean the world to me and I feel so lucky to have you in my life."

"San, you are my best friend, I'm the lucky one. You understand me and my silly ways and it doesn't even bother you! You mean everything to me."

Brittany and I return to hugging and I feel so completely lost in her. I have never felt so comforted and uniquely important to someone. I know a lot of people say they will be best friends with someone for the rest of their lives but I know for a fact that Brittany and I will always be best friends. There is no way I will ever let something come between us.

* * *

><p>"There you two are! We have to go practice for the Group Stunt. Let's go."<p>

"Sorry Q. How did your power tumbler go?"

"It was fine B but really let's go, we have to walk through these steps we are on in forty-five minutes."

I had no idea our time between events was so short. Brittany and I quickly follow Quinn outside where Coach is standing with Marcus waiting for us. She looks slightly annoyed but not at us. She is basically death glaring Marcus right now.

"Everything okay Coach."

Apparently Quinn noticed the annoyed expression on Coach's face as well.

"Yes, it should be fine. Marcus decided it would be a good idea to get pizza with the other guys and stuffed his face. I swear on all that is holy Marcus if you get sick during the routine or miss one single step you'll be off this team! Now, get in your places and let's walk through this!"

I had never seen Coach so mad before. Really she's not as mad as she is annoyed but she has never threatened a student like this before, I suddenly have this eerily reminder of the high school coach from cheer camp. Oh God, I'm going to have to deal with that monster in like two months. I refocus my attention and walk through the steps. Our routine ends with Marcus tossing me into the air. I do a few flips and then he catches me right as the music stops. We don't practice the toss because Coach doesn't want to over work his arms. She wants to make sure that we get as much air in the move as possible. But we've practiced it like ten times a day for the last two months so I'm not worried about that move.

We head back into the school ten minutes before we are to perform. We all grab a drink and our headphones and walk to the stage. As we wait back stage I watch as Brittany and Quinn walk through their steps a few more times. There is a pretty tricky step where Brittany goes from a flip to tossing Quinn in the air in what seems like all one move. It's a pretty amazing step but their timing has to be absolutely perfect to pull it off.

Our squad is called to the wings of the stage, we're up next. I watch the team perform before us, they're okay but I know we're better. I feel arms snake around my waist from behind. I turn my head to the side to see Brittany

"You can do this San."

"I know I can as long as I have you right next to me B."

I smile at her as the other squad goes rushing past. It's our turn, the last event of this tiring and grueling weekend. We walk out on to the stage and take our places. The music seems to start instantly, within seconds I am twisting and turning through the air. Marcus catches me and we transition into single leg lifts and aerials. The music is coming to an end. Brittany completes her flips to the Quinn toss perfectly. I perform three back flips and when I land the final flip I feel Marcus's hands on my waist lifting me from the mat. He then lifts me and tosses me up slightly so I am standing on his palms. Then I feel him lower his arms and throw me high into the air. This is by far the highest he's tossed me before.

I begin my twists and flips in the air. As I begin my last move I make eye contact with Brittany and she looks absolutely petrified. She is white as a ghost, fear floods her face. As my rotation continues I can see why, Marcus isn't in position to catch me, there's no time for anyone to catch me. I feel the fear race through my body and then everything goes black.

* * *

><p>"Santana, sweetie can you hear me?"<p>

I faintly hear Cheryl yelling my name, everything hurts, and I can't breathe. My eyes slowly flutter open and I feel like my head is going to explode. There are people all around me. I search the faces frantically looking for the familiar blue eyes that always bring me comfort. I try to sit up but Cheryl's hand force me back down and then there they are; the blue eyes I need to see. Brittany intertwines our fingers and squeezes my hand.

"Don't move San, I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. I have you please don't move."

The begging in her eyes makes my heart sink. I've never seen her look so worried before. I look into her eyes searching for an answer as to what is going on. I feel something warm running down my face and head. I try to reach up with my hand but then Quinn grabs my hand and squeezes. Tears are streaming down her cheeks. I've never seen Quinn get emotional over someone being injured. A lot of girls have been dropped or fallen from the top of the pyramid. There have been a few mild concussions this season as well as a sprained ankle but something in Quinn's face tells me I don't have a minor injury.

"Excuse us, excuse us! Please step aside and let us in."

Quinn is pushed to the side as is Brittany. Tears start pouring from my eyes when my hand loses contact with Brittany's. I need her right next to me; I need to feel her strength in my hand. I stretch my hand out begging for contact with Brittany. The paramedics slip a brace around my neck which restrains the movements of my head. I feel a needle pierce the skin in the crease of my left elbow. They are shouting directions to other people. I can't see what is going on all around me. Everyone is moving so fast and everything seems to be happening even faster. I feel gauze pressed against my forehead. Then they roll me onto my side and then back onto my back except now I am laying on a backboard instead of the gym floor. The paramedics strap me to the board and then lift me into the air and start to walk out of the gymnasium. I can't go without Brittany; I need her to be with me.

"Brittany, Brittany please don't leave me. I need you, where are you. Brittany please!"

"Please can I ride with her to the hospital? She's my best friend I can't let her go alone."

I still can't see Brittany but I hear her begging the paramedics to let her ride in the ambulance with me. She is not taking no for an answer. I've never heard her be so insistent before and I've never been more grateful for such insistence.

"She has my permission to ride in the ambulance. Please allow her to do so. Neither one of them are going to be okay without the other in this moment. I'll call Santana's parents and let them know what is going on but please just let Brittany ride with her."

Cheryl's pleads with the paramedics seem to do the trick as I hear one of them say okay. They load me into the back of the ambulance and Brittany climbs in through the side door and sits on the bench next to me. I can see her out of the corner of my eye.

"I'm right here San, I'm not going anywhere. Can I hold her hand, please?'

The paramedic must have nodded yes because I feel Brittany weave her fingers through mine and squeeze my hand. I know she is trying to reassure me everything is going to be okay but I'm still feeling dazed and confused by what is going on. The rear doors of the ambulance slam shut and I hear the sirens turn on and the ambulance lurch forward. They must be fairly concerned about my condition if they are using the sirens. We hit a bump in the road and I instantly feel sick. I need to throw up but I can't turn my head to the side to avoid getting it all over myself. But I can't hold it in either. We hit another bump and I vomit all over. I feel like I'm choking.

I can hear Brittany crying as the paramedic lifts the backboard up a little forcing Brittany to let go of my hand. This is the only way he can turn me on my side. I continue throwing up for a bit longer; every bump we hit sends a surge of nausea through my stomach. When we reach the hospital the paramedic instructs Brittany to wait to get out of the ambulance until they have unloaded me. She listens to them like my life depended on it.

* * *

><p>I'm wheeled through the emergency room and into a trauma room. The doctor comes in and speaks with the paramedics about my vitals and what was told to them about what happened. Brittany stands quietly in the corner watching as the doctor speaks with them. Tears are streaming down her face, which has turned all blotchy and red from her crying. The doctor examines me and lists off a series of tests and x-rays he wants ran and then leaves the room. The nurse patiently explains to Brittany that I will be okay and that she can take a seat next to me while we wait for someone in radiology to come for me.<p>

Brittany sits in a chair next to my hospital bed. I'm still strapped to the backboard because they don't want me moving until they have performed the x-rays and CT scan. Brittany grabs hold of my hand and strokes her thumb across my knuckles. I try to look at her, I want to see those comforting blue eyes but I can't turn my head. I just want to sit up and hug Brittany; I want her to see that I'm really okay and for her to stop crying. But I'm strapped to this fucking backboard and I can't hold her, I can't embrace her and show her that I'm okay. So I do the only physical thing I can and I squeeze her hand back. I try to communicate everything I'm feeling by squeezing her hand.

We sit there in silence waiting for someone to come in, someone to break the silence. It's like we are both afraid to speak.

"Brittany, sweetie how is she? Has the doctor been in? What's going on? Her parents are on their way."

"Umm, she's okay, I think. The doctor came in for like only five minutes and ordered a bunch of tests and then left. He hasn't been back since, no one has Mom. I don't think they are worried enough."

"I… my parents are coming? I think I'm going to be sick again?"

My stomach is turning over. I don't want to stress out and worry my parents. They have so much to worry about already. Wait, if they are both coming who did they get to watch Mannie, they wouldn't bring him with them, would they? I can feel the acid burn my throat as my worries and the spinning in my head make me feel like the world has flipped me upside down. I start to choke on the bile creeping up my throat and into my mouth. I hear Cheryl rush out of the room yelling for a nurse.

People come rushing in and turn the backboard on its side and start suctioning the bile from my mouth and throat. Never before, have I felt so completely incapable of taking care of myself. The doctor calls someone on the phone in my room and tells them they need to hurry.

* * *

><p>Minutes later I'm being wheeled to the radiology department. This time, no matter how much Brittany begged, they made her wait in my room. I feel like I have been gone for hours. They have x-rayed every bone I have; at least it feels like they have. Then they put me through the CT scan, which felt like being shoved into a very small cavern. I'm definitely not a fan of that exam. When I'm wheeled back into my room my parents are standing in there waiting and Brittany and Cheryl are gone. I immediately start crying. I love my parents and I'm happy to see them but Brittany is the only person I want right now.<p>

"Where's Brittany? Did she leave me?"

"Shh sweetie. It's okay. Her mom took her with her to go get us all some coffees. She couldn't carry them all by herself and honestly Brittany needed a break from this room."

The doctor walks into the room followed by Brittany and her mom. I feel a smile spread across my face for the first time in hours when I see Brittany walk in. She hands a coffee to my mom and walks to my side taking my hand in hers.

"Well I have good news and bad news, which do you want to hear first."

"Please doctor; just tell us what is going on. I'm a surgeon so please give me all the details about my daughter's condition. We have been left relatively in the dark thus far by your staff. I don't even know what type of injuries you were concerned about."

"My apologies for not keeping you updated. It's been a busy day. Moving on, your daughter has quite the laundry list of injuries but considering the height from which she fell I'd say she is pretty lucky."

"What are we looking at doctor?"

"Your daughter has a severe concussion; this is what has me worried most. However, I'm still going to release her tonight since you're a doctor as well and know the warning signs to look for with a concussion. I'm going to recommend that you keep her awake for at least the next twelve hours and then do occasional memory checks after those twelve hours. She also has two broken ribs and a broken right collar bone. We had a laceration on her head which required eight stitches. I'm sure she'll be sore for quite a while, it might be worth keeping her home from school the next week and no cheerleading until she is one hundred percent healed. From the broken bones as well as the concussion."

"We understand doctor."

"We'll going to send her home with some pain pills and nausea medication. She'll have to wear a brace for the next six weeks for the collar bone and we'll place her right arm in a sling to help with the healing of that bone. We'll tape her ribs but unfortunately we can't do much more than that. I'll have the nurse come in and get her unstrapped, I'm sure she'll love to be able to sit up, and take the neck brace off. She'll also administer some meds before taking the I.V. out. Then you can sign the discharge papers and be on your way."

"Thank you."

* * *

><p>As the nurse begins to undo the straps I can't help but wiggle my legs and arms in relief. I've been strapped to this board for hours and all I want to do is sit-up. Once all of the straps are removed I try to sit up and for the first time I really feel the pain. I stop moving and look at Brittany. Knowingly she reaches out and helps me sit up; trying to take on as much of my weight as she can.<p>

"Am I going to ride back with the team?"

"No sweetie."

"Oh, well can Brittany ride back with us then?"

I want them to understand, my parents and Cheryl, that I need Brittany with me. I need to feel her hand in mine right now. I just want to be next to her.

"Of course sweetheart, Cheryl and Brittany will both be riding back with us. The team left hours ago."

"They did? How did we do? Did Coach tell you the results?"

I can't believe I missed the awards ceremony. I can't believe the team just left and didn't wait to see if I was okay. I wonder if Quinn put up a fight about having to leave. Maybe those tears on stage were just for show, but we have become a lot closer this year so maybe they were real tears."

"The team had to get back honey. You all did very, very well. Coach said she has never been prouder of any team she's very coached before. You guys took first place in all three team dance competitions and in the team cheer competition. Brittany and Tony took first place in the duet competition. Quinn took third in the power tumbler event and you took first."

"What about the Group Stunt? Did I ruin it for us? Did my fall cost us the competition."

"Your fall? Santana you didn't fall! That idiot was so busy starring at some girl in the audience that he missed you. He didn't even try to catch you."

I've never heard Brittany sound so angry before. What was even scarier is how angry she looked. She is enraged. Even though she is mad, very very mad, my heart fills with joy because Brittany is so angry because I was hurt. She's mad at Marcus for hurting me, which means I really do mean a lot to her.

"The drop resulted in a fairly significant deduction but you still placed. You took third in the group stunt. You would have won decidedly so if Marcus had not messed up."

"Is Coach mad at me then? Am I off the team?"

"Of course not Santana. This wasn't your fault. Marcus on the other hand is in very hot water. No one is talking to him, not even the kid from the AV club."

I feel relieved to know Coach isn't upset with me. As soon as that worry lifts another settles deep inside my chest. Brittany's been here the whole time which means she missed the awards ceremony as well. I feel awful and like the worst friend in the world. She worked so hard and she missed receiving the applause she deserves for choreographing the most amazing dance routines. Tears fill my eyes and start to stream down my face. I feel horrible.

"San, what's wrong? We did an awesome job. You were amazing! Please don't be upset about the Group Stunt, it's really not that big of a deal, plus we still placed."

"It's not that Britt. It's just that because of me you missed the awards ceremony. You did such an amazing job and you worked so hard. You deserved to receive those awards."

"Oh San. I like being a cheerleader and dancing is my passion but in the end you matter so much more. Being there to accept those awards would have meant nothing if you weren't there. I'm glad I was able to be here with you. You are the most important person in my life."

A fresh round of tears makes their way down my cheeks. Brittany is truly the greatest friend a person could ask for. Twenty minutes later I'm hobbling my way towards my parents SUV. My dad pulled the car up to the emergency room doors so I didn't have to walk too far. Brittany and my mom help me into the car while my dad loads our bags into the back. Cheryl had brought them with her when the bus dropped her off at the hospital.

* * *

><p>More than anything I want to rest my head in Brittany's lap and fall asleep. But I'm not allowed to. For the entire two hour drive back to Lima my parents, Cheryl, and Brittany keep me awake by playing every ridiculous game they can think of, even resorting to singing "Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall." By the time we arrive back in Lima it is well past midnight and I'm exhausted but still not allowed to sleep for another nine hours or so.<p>

"Mom, Dad can Brittany still stay the night?"

"Of course honey, we need someone to help us keep you awake. As long as you are okay with it still, Cheryl."

"Oh yes, of course. That was the plan. If could just drop me off at the school that would be lovely."

We stop at the school and Cheryl gives Brittany and me a kiss on the cheek as she exits the car. She tells Brittany to call in the morning when she's ready to come home or when the Lopezs are sick of her. Honestly, I don't think either of those things would ever occur. My mom gives Cheryl a hug goodbye and thanks her for taking such good care of me. My dad waits until Cheryl is in her car and driving away before he puts the car in drive and heads home.

It's late when we pull into the driveway. I notice my abuela's car parked next to my dad's truck. She must have agreed to watch Mannie for my parents. I feel guilty for inconveniencing them. We walk into the house and it is very quiet and very dark. My dad flips on the light in the hall way and walks off to his office.

"I'm going to go find abuela, I'm sure she's asleep in the guest bedroom. Why don't you and Brittany go downstairs to the family room and pick out something to watch. Do not go to your bedroom, I know you'll be too tempted to sleep if you go there. I'll make you two something to eat and bring it down in a bit, okay?"

I lead Brittany through the darkened house and down the stairs to the family room. It's funny that we call it the family room because we never use it as a family. I'll occasionally sit down here if it is a particularly hot summer day but other than that the room never gets used. The family room has a large television and a giant sectional couch. The center piece of the sectional is actually a sofa bed. Brittany helps me pull out the sofa bed; actually she does the majority of the work because I can barely lift a cushion without wincing from the pain.

* * *

><p>"Santana Marie Lopez, you are not allowed to lie on that bed. You need to stay awake. Here are some sandwiches and chips. Come up stairs and get some sodas and whatever else you want. Mannie is being restless tonight so I'm going to go deal with him for a bit. Brittany, I really need your help keeping her awake, okay?"<p>

Brittany nods in understanding at my mom and then offers me a sympathetic smile. I know that she is just as tired as I am. I feel bad that she is going to try and stay up with me. This is like pure torture. I have to stay awake for at least another eight hours and all I want to do is sleep. Brittany and I walk upstairs to grab some sodas from the fridge. Brittany is being so tender and sweet to me. She walks behind me up the stairs with her hand gently pressed against my back, like she's afraid I'm going to fall down the stairs or something. When we reach the top of the stairs I feel Brittany gently grasp my left wrist.

"Hey San, can I meet your little brother? I mean since he is awake."

My heart begins to race as soon as I hear the question. This is what the sleepover was initially about. It wasn't about keeping me awake; it was or is about introducing Brittany to Mannie. It's about letting her in; letting her see what my home life is really like. She has given me so much today, I can't deny her this. I take her right hand in my left and lead her down the hallway to my brother's room.

"Wait right here, just so I can make sure he's actually awake."

I walk into my brother's room and my mom is sitting in the rocking chair next to his bed reading a book while Mannie watches Scooby-Doo. Scooby is one of his all-time favorite cartoons. My mom looks up from her book with a puzzled expression.

"Um… I'm wondering if it would be okay to let Brittany meet Mannie?"

"Of course sweetie, I didn't realize that they hadn't met yet. He's wide awake so bring her in. I have a feeling abuela made him go to bed too early tonight. Looks like it's a late night for the entire Lopez gang."

I smile at my mom and walk back into the hallway. Brittany is resting against the wall waiting for me. I walk up to her and lace my fingers through hers guiding her into my brother's room. I take a deep breath, as deep as I can considering the pain, as we walk into my brother's room.

"Brittany this is my brother Mannie. Mannie this is Brittany."

* * *

><p>Brittany smiles as she gently lifts Mannie's hand and shakes it. He smiles up at her and I feel my heart swell. Brittany's eyes are full of love and kindness. She isn't judging him by his looks or his limitations. She sees him as a little boy obsessed with Scooby-Doo.<p>

"It's so nice to meet you Mannie. Do you mind if Santana and I watch some Scooby with you, it's one of my favorites."

My mom chuckles at Brittany. Thankfully Mannie's room has a couch in it, so Brittany and I sit down on the couch and start to watch Scooby-Doo. Just as I start to get comfortable my tummy growls. Brittany looks at me and then leaves the room. Moments later she returns with the plate of sandwiches my mom had us as well as our soda and chips. We sit on Mannie's couch and watch episode after episode of Scooby-Doo. Hours later I look around and see that Mannie and my mom are both asleep. I grip Brittany's hand and lead her out of the room, turning off the lights and television. Once we are back in the family room I give Brittany the best hug I can muster.

* * *

><p>"Thanks for everything today Britt."<p>

"San, you're amazing. And Mannie is like the cutest little boy ever. I'm so glad I now know everyone in your family you're all so fantastic. I can't even tell you how much you mean to me."

I smile as Brittany speaks. Her words feel me with such unexplainable joy. I stare into her eyes as she leans in and places a gentle kiss upon my lips. It's not something I was expecting but it feels perfect in the moment. I kiss back parting my lips and begging her to part hers. She grants me entrance and I lose myself in her kiss.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Notes:<strong>

Thank you for your comments. I'd love to know what you think! I know I have rated this story M and it will eventually have M content but it won't be for awhile.

Also I am still looking to bring a Beta on board so if you're interested please let me know!


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